WEBVTT 00:00:02.000 --> 00:00:07.000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:13.000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:47.500 ♪ upbeat holiday music ♪ 00:01:07.730 --> 00:01:09.740 ♪ ♪ 00:01:30.050 --> 00:01:32.050 ♪ ♪ 00:01:49.480 --> 00:01:51.490 ♪ ♪ 00:02:08.960 --> 00:02:10.960 [ "Candy Cane Lane" by Sia playing ] 00:02:10.960 --> 00:02:14.510 ♪ Take a trip down Candy Cane Lane with me ♪ 00:02:14.510 --> 00:02:17.260 ♪ It's the cutest thing I swear you'll ever see ♪ 00:02:17.260 --> 00:02:20.810 ♪ It's the best, so get dressed ♪ 00:02:20.810 --> 00:02:25.690 ♪ I'll impress you with the colors of the rainbow ♪ 00:02:25.690 --> 00:02:29.310 ♪ Take a trip down Candy Cane Lane with me ♪ 00:02:29.310 --> 00:02:31.860 ♪ It's so magical, let's go there in your dreams ♪ 00:02:31.860 --> 00:02:33.400 ♪ It's the best... ♪ 00:02:33.400 --> 00:02:35.490 TRUDY: ...so surprised when he saw all those presents 00:02:35.490 --> 00:02:38.280 under the Christmas tree, and she was one of them. 00:02:38.280 --> 00:02:42.160 Now, this house was originally owned by Herbert Flackshaw, 00:02:42.160 --> 00:02:44.500 who started this tradition on Candy Cane Lane. 00:02:44.500 --> 00:02:48.920 He even hired his nephew Otis to play Santa Claus for many years, 00:02:48.920 --> 00:02:51.710 until he was arrested for child endangerment in 1992. 00:02:51.710 --> 00:02:54.210 Ooh, you guys got to look at this house. 00:02:54.210 --> 00:02:55.630 This house is the site... 00:02:55.630 --> 00:02:57.630 HARPER: Are you having fun? 00:02:58.640 --> 00:02:59.970 ‐ Are you having fun? 00:02:59.970 --> 00:03:01.890 ‐ [ laughing ] Yes, I think this is cute. 00:03:01.890 --> 00:03:03.310 ‐ It is. Yeah. 00:03:03.310 --> 00:03:05.520 ‐ Oh, God, you hate it. 00:03:05.520 --> 00:03:07.310 ‐ [ laughing ] No, I don't hate it. 00:03:07.310 --> 00:03:09.230 Baby, I'm just not a huge Christmas person. 00:03:09.230 --> 00:03:11.440 ‐ I know, I know, but... [ groans ] 00:03:11.440 --> 00:03:13.980 how can you not like the lights and the decorations 00:03:13.980 --> 00:03:15.780 and the Christmas trees? 00:03:15.780 --> 00:03:20.070 ‐ Fun fact: did you know that Christmas trees are responsible 00:03:20.070 --> 00:03:23.200 for an annual average of four deaths, 00:03:23.200 --> 00:03:25.250 15 injuries 00:03:25.250 --> 00:03:28.670 and a loss of $12 million? 00:03:28.670 --> 00:03:30.380 ‐ [ laughing ] Okay, I get it. 00:03:30.380 --> 00:03:32.210 I think you made your point. ‐ [ chuckles ] 00:03:32.210 --> 00:03:34.250 Thank you for trying to get me to like Christmas. 00:03:34.250 --> 00:03:35.710 I love that you love it. 00:03:35.710 --> 00:03:37.800 I'm just so content taking care of other people's pets 00:03:37.800 --> 00:03:39.510 when they're away for the holiday‐‐ ‐ [ gasps ] 00:03:39.510 --> 00:03:40.930 Come with me. 00:03:42.640 --> 00:03:44.430 ‐ Wait, where are we going? 00:03:46.430 --> 00:03:47.980 Do you know these people? 00:03:47.980 --> 00:03:49.980 What are you doing? ‐ No. Come here. 00:03:54.230 --> 00:03:57.070 ‐ [ grunts ] Still not clear on the plan. 00:03:57.070 --> 00:03:59.570 ‐ Will you shut up and follow me, please? 00:03:59.570 --> 00:04:01.530 Come on. 00:04:01.530 --> 00:04:02.950 ‐ [ scoffs ] 00:04:09.370 --> 00:04:11.210 ‐ [ Harper sighs ] 00:04:13.630 --> 00:04:15.590 Well, does this do anything for you? 00:04:19.880 --> 00:04:21.890 ‐ This is beautiful. 00:04:23.600 --> 00:04:25.970 HARPER: I hate that you're gonna be alone on Christmas. 00:04:25.970 --> 00:04:27.810 I'm gonna miss you. 00:04:27.810 --> 00:04:29.810 ‐ Hey, I'm gonna miss you, too. 00:04:29.810 --> 00:04:31.770 ‐ We could just stay up here. 00:04:34.400 --> 00:04:36.780 ‐ I'd do that. ‐ [ chuckles ] 00:04:37.940 --> 00:04:39.860 WOMAN: Hey! I hear you up there. 00:04:39.860 --> 00:04:41.200 I'm calling the police. ‐ [ gasps ] 00:04:41.200 --> 00:04:42.660 ‐ Um... ‐ [ gasping ] 00:04:42.660 --> 00:04:44.070 ‐ [ both grunting ] 00:04:44.070 --> 00:04:45.990 [ sliding ] ‐ [ Abby grunts ] 00:04:45.990 --> 00:04:47.700 ‐ Abby? ABBY: Harper! 00:04:47.700 --> 00:04:50.210 ‐ [ screams ] Oh, my God. 00:04:50.210 --> 00:04:51.960 Are you okay? ‐ Um... 00:04:51.960 --> 00:04:54.290 I don't know. Uh, what do I do? 00:04:54.290 --> 00:04:56.250 ‐ Stay there. I'm gonna get you down. 00:04:56.250 --> 00:04:57.710 ‐ Okay. Yeah. 00:04:57.710 --> 00:04:59.590 ‐ Shit. ‐ Uh... 00:05:00.630 --> 00:05:02.430 [ gasps ] Oh. 00:05:02.430 --> 00:05:04.090 WOMAN: What are you doing out there? 00:05:04.090 --> 00:05:05.890 ‐ Harper! WOMAN: Are you peeping? 00:05:05.890 --> 00:05:07.470 Don't you peep at me. 00:05:07.470 --> 00:05:08.560 ‐ Oh, God! [ yells ] 00:05:08.560 --> 00:05:09.850 [ air hissing ] HARPER: Abby? 00:05:09.850 --> 00:05:11.810 ‐ [ groaning ] 00:05:11.810 --> 00:05:13.600 ‐ Oh, my God. Are you okay? 00:05:13.600 --> 00:05:15.190 ‐ I'm so great. 00:05:15.190 --> 00:05:16.770 ‐ Here, here. Yeah, yeah, come on. 00:05:16.770 --> 00:05:17.980 We got to go. Come on. 00:05:17.980 --> 00:05:19.190 She's coming. Go. Run. ‐ Oh. Hey. 00:05:19.190 --> 00:05:20.610 Yeah, you better run. 00:05:20.610 --> 00:05:22.280 Pervert. ‐ [ laughing ] 00:05:22.280 --> 00:05:24.280 ‐ Who said you could come downstairs? 00:05:24.280 --> 00:05:25.950 Giddyap. 00:05:25.950 --> 00:05:27.950 ‐ [ both laughing ] 00:05:29.120 --> 00:05:30.290 [ whooping ] 00:05:31.330 --> 00:05:33.330 [ laughing continues ] 00:05:45.430 --> 00:05:47.430 ‐ [ Harper sighs ] 00:05:47.430 --> 00:05:48.970 Come with me. 00:05:48.970 --> 00:05:50.520 ‐ Where? 00:05:50.520 --> 00:05:53.100 ‐ To my parents' house for Christmas. 00:05:53.100 --> 00:05:55.730 ‐ Oh, really? 00:05:55.730 --> 00:05:57.650 I've got the pets to sit. 00:05:57.650 --> 00:06:00.440 ‐ Oh, my God, get someone to cover for you. 00:06:00.440 --> 00:06:02.650 I want to... 00:06:02.650 --> 00:06:05.320 wake up with you on Christmas morning. 00:06:05.320 --> 00:06:08.370 And if that doesn't convince you to love Christmas, 00:06:08.370 --> 00:06:10.370 I'll never bring it up again. 00:06:12.620 --> 00:06:14.870 ‐ Deal. 00:06:14.870 --> 00:06:16.790 Yeah. ‐ Mm. 00:06:28.180 --> 00:06:31.520 [ "Jingle Bells" by Joy Oladokun playing ] 00:06:31.520 --> 00:06:34.810 [ in distance ] ♪ Dashing through the snow ♪ 00:06:34.810 --> 00:06:38.110 ♪ In a one‐horse open sleigh ♪ 00:06:38.110 --> 00:06:41.440 ♪ O'er the fields we go ♪ 00:06:41.440 --> 00:06:44.690 ♪ Laughing all the way ♪ 00:06:44.690 --> 00:06:47.820 ♪ Bells on bobtails ring ♪ 00:06:47.820 --> 00:06:49.070 [ door closes ] 00:06:49.070 --> 00:06:50.580 ♪ Making spirits bright ♪ 00:06:50.580 --> 00:06:54.370 ♪ What fun it is to laugh and sing ♪ 00:06:54.370 --> 00:06:57.330 ♪ A sleighing song tonight ♪ 00:06:57.330 --> 00:06:59.290 ♪ Oh, jingle bells... ♪ 00:06:59.290 --> 00:07:00.540 ‐ Hi. 00:07:00.540 --> 00:07:01.750 ‐ Hey. 00:07:01.750 --> 00:07:02.920 Sit down. 00:07:02.920 --> 00:07:05.050 ‐ What's going on in here? 00:07:05.050 --> 00:07:08.720 ‐ I just woke up thinking about going home with you and got... 00:07:08.720 --> 00:07:10.680 very excited about Christmas. 00:07:10.680 --> 00:07:15.060 ‐ Oh... baby, you don't‐‐ You don't have to come with me. 00:07:15.060 --> 00:07:16.230 ‐ Well, I want to. HARPER: No. 00:07:16.230 --> 00:07:18.020 No, no, no, no, I‐‐ [ sighs ] 00:07:18.020 --> 00:07:20.190 I feel like I really put you on the spot last night, 00:07:20.190 --> 00:07:22.730 and I understand how you feel about Christmas 00:07:22.730 --> 00:07:24.820 because you lost your parents, and you just don't have‐‐ 00:07:24.820 --> 00:07:26.950 ‐ No, no, no, I‐I genuinely want to go. 00:07:26.950 --> 00:07:28.860 ‐ Uh‐huh. 00:07:28.860 --> 00:07:31.910 ‐ I get to go meet the people that made my favorite person. 00:07:31.910 --> 00:07:33.620 ‐ Okay. 00:07:33.620 --> 00:07:36.370 But who's gonna look after all those pets? 00:07:36.370 --> 00:07:38.370 ‐ John's gonna cover for me. 00:07:42.840 --> 00:07:45.050 I know why you're worried. 00:07:45.050 --> 00:07:47.170 But don't be. 00:07:47.170 --> 00:07:49.340 I'm all in on Christmas. 00:07:49.340 --> 00:07:50.970 ‐ [ inhales deeply ] 00:07:50.970 --> 00:07:52.970 ABBY: Hmm? ‐ Good. 00:07:52.970 --> 00:07:54.560 ABBY: Yeah. 00:07:56.680 --> 00:07:58.310 So, for the cat, you can go every other day, 00:07:58.310 --> 00:08:00.440 but the dog and the fish need to be seen morning and night. 00:08:00.440 --> 00:08:01.860 ‐ Mm‐hmm. Okay. ‐ Oh, and the apartment on Butler 00:08:01.860 --> 00:08:03.730 has this weird lock, so if you jiggle it, 00:08:03.730 --> 00:08:05.900 it will lock, but you have to make sure that you do that. 00:08:05.900 --> 00:08:07.690 ‐ Yes. ‐ What are you doing on your phone? 00:08:07.690 --> 00:08:10.240 ‐ I'm sorry, I left a gentleman alone in my apartment, 00:08:10.240 --> 00:08:12.240 so I'm tracking him to make sure he leaves. 00:08:12.240 --> 00:08:14.160 ‐ You're tracking him? ‐ Yeah. I track everybody. 00:08:14.160 --> 00:08:16.580 If the NSA can do it, so can I. 00:08:16.580 --> 00:08:18.250 And he's gone. Sorry, what were you saying? 00:08:19.290 --> 00:08:20.750 ‐ I wrote it all down. 00:08:20.750 --> 00:08:22.250 They're really specific directions, 00:08:22.250 --> 00:08:24.090 but if you need anything, you can obviously call me. 00:08:24.090 --> 00:08:25.300 ‐ Abigail, don't worry. 00:08:25.300 --> 00:08:28.380 I'm responsible for the careers of dozens of authors. 00:08:28.380 --> 00:08:31.050 I am more than capable of taking care of a few pets for two days. 00:08:31.050 --> 00:08:33.180 ‐ It's... it's five days. 00:08:33.180 --> 00:08:34.180 ‐ Five days. That's what I said. 00:08:34.180 --> 00:08:35.180 WAITER: Refill? ‐ Hi. 00:08:35.180 --> 00:08:38.350 And I sort of think I made the right decision, but at the same time‐‐ 00:08:38.350 --> 00:08:39.560 ‐ What is Ultrasuede? 00:08:39.560 --> 00:08:42.810 ‐ Ultrasuede is, like, a water‐resistant fabric. 00:08:42.810 --> 00:08:44.230 ‐ Hello. 00:08:44.230 --> 00:08:45.770 ‐ What are we doing here? 00:08:45.770 --> 00:08:47.230 ‐ Hi. Can I help you? 00:08:47.230 --> 00:08:48.900 ‐ Yeah, I'm picking up. My name's Abby Holland. 00:08:48.900 --> 00:08:50.740 ‐ Oh, yes, of course. Um, just wait right here. 00:08:50.740 --> 00:08:52.910 I'll be right back. Oh, enjoy some champagne. 00:08:52.910 --> 00:08:54.700 ‐ Oh. 00:08:54.700 --> 00:08:55.830 Thank you. 00:08:55.830 --> 00:08:57.700 I love champagne. 00:08:58.950 --> 00:09:00.620 ‐ Here we are. 00:09:01.580 --> 00:09:02.830 May I? ‐ Yeah, of course. Thanks. 00:09:08.590 --> 00:09:10.420 There it is. 00:09:10.420 --> 00:09:12.050 ‐ No. 00:09:13.760 --> 00:09:15.680 Abby, you and Harper have a perfect relationship. 00:09:15.680 --> 00:09:17.470 Why do you want to ruin that 00:09:17.470 --> 00:09:19.890 by engaging in one of the most archaic institutions 00:09:19.890 --> 00:09:22.100 in the history of the human race? 00:09:22.100 --> 00:09:23.850 ‐ Because I want to marry her. 00:09:23.850 --> 00:09:26.650 ‐ Okay, you say that, but what you're actually doing 00:09:26.650 --> 00:09:28.900 is tricking the woman you claim to love 00:09:28.900 --> 00:09:31.440 by trapping her in a box of heteronormativity 00:09:31.440 --> 00:09:33.320 and trying to make her your property. 00:09:33.320 --> 00:09:35.780 She is not a rice cooker or a cake plate. 00:09:35.780 --> 00:09:37.160 She's a human being. 00:09:37.160 --> 00:09:38.540 ‐ No, it's not about owning her. 00:09:38.540 --> 00:09:40.080 It's about building a life with her. 00:09:40.080 --> 00:09:44.670 She is my person, and I really want everyone to know that. 00:09:46.000 --> 00:09:49.090 ‐ I suppose that's one way of looking at it. 00:09:49.090 --> 00:09:51.090 So, when are you gonna ask her? 00:09:52.670 --> 00:09:54.590 ‐ I was thinking of doing it on New Year's, 00:09:54.590 --> 00:09:56.720 but now that I'm going home with her... 00:09:56.720 --> 00:09:58.760 I understand this is very old‐fashioned, 00:09:58.760 --> 00:10:00.850 but I'm probably gonna ask her dad for his blessing 00:10:00.850 --> 00:10:02.850 and propose on Christmas morning. 00:10:04.230 --> 00:10:07.980 ‐ I'm sorry, ask her dad for his blessing? 00:10:07.980 --> 00:10:11.360 [ "Jolly Old Saint Nicholas" by Caveboy playing ] 00:10:11.360 --> 00:10:13.190 Way to stick it to the patriarchy. 00:10:13.190 --> 00:10:15.160 Really well done. 00:10:15.160 --> 00:10:18.620 ♪ Jolly old Saint Nicholas ♪ 00:10:18.620 --> 00:10:21.580 ♪ Lean your ear this way ♪ 00:10:21.580 --> 00:10:25.040 ♪ Don't you tell a single soul ♪ 00:10:25.040 --> 00:10:27.960 ♪ What I'm gonna say... ♪ 00:10:27.960 --> 00:10:29.340 ABBY: God, I'm so excited. 00:10:29.340 --> 00:10:32.460 I can't believe I'm finally gonna meet everyone. 00:10:32.460 --> 00:10:36.260 I mean, I haven't had a family Christmas in ten years. 00:10:36.260 --> 00:10:38.680 Also, a fact you don't know about me: 00:10:38.680 --> 00:10:41.430 I am actually very good with parents. 00:10:41.430 --> 00:10:44.140 ‐ Okay, there's something that we should talk about 00:10:44.140 --> 00:10:45.730 before we get to my parents' house. 00:10:45.730 --> 00:10:46.810 ‐ What is it? 00:10:46.810 --> 00:10:48.810 ‐ Do you remember this summer 00:10:48.810 --> 00:10:53.030 when I came out to my parents and told them we were together 00:10:53.030 --> 00:10:55.240 and they took it really well? 00:10:55.240 --> 00:10:56.950 ‐ Yeah. 00:10:56.950 --> 00:11:01.370 ‐ Okay, well, that wasn't entirely accurate. 00:11:01.370 --> 00:11:03.790 ‐ They didn't take it well? 00:11:03.790 --> 00:11:05.830 ‐ No. No, no. 00:11:05.830 --> 00:11:08.330 Um... 00:11:08.330 --> 00:11:10.340 I didn't tell them. 00:11:12.800 --> 00:11:15.130 I was going to, and then Dad told us 00:11:15.130 --> 00:11:16.930 that he was running for mayor, 00:11:16.930 --> 00:11:19.260 and it just didn't feel like the right time, 00:11:19.260 --> 00:11:22.100 and then now he's trying to get the support of this donor, 00:11:22.100 --> 00:11:24.560 and our whole Christmas is about impressing this person, 00:11:24.560 --> 00:11:27.690 which is stressing my mom out even more than usual, and I just‐‐ 00:11:27.690 --> 00:11:30.060 I know that if I tell them now, 00:11:30.060 --> 00:11:33.400 their reaction is gonna be colored by all this other stress, 00:11:33.400 --> 00:11:35.900 and I‐I'm sorry, I don't think that's fair. 00:11:35.900 --> 00:11:37.650 To you or to us. 00:11:37.650 --> 00:11:39.320 ‐ Then why did you invite me? 00:11:39.320 --> 00:11:43.740 ‐ Because we were just having such a special night, and... 00:11:43.740 --> 00:11:47.580 and, fine, I got carried away, but it's because I love you 00:11:47.580 --> 00:11:51.250 and‐and I want to give you such a great Christmas. 00:11:51.250 --> 00:11:53.670 ‐ You're off to a really great start. 00:11:53.670 --> 00:11:54.840 ‐ I'm so sorry. 00:11:54.840 --> 00:11:56.880 ‐ So, who do they think I am? 00:11:56.880 --> 00:11:58.340 ‐ My roommate. 00:11:58.340 --> 00:12:00.300 ‐ They don't think it's weird that you're bringing 00:12:00.300 --> 00:12:02.050 your roommate home for Christmas? 00:12:02.050 --> 00:12:04.810 ‐ No, because I told them that you had nowhere else to go 00:12:04.810 --> 00:12:08.890 because your parents are no longer with us. 00:12:08.890 --> 00:12:10.230 ‐ I'm not going. 00:12:10.230 --> 00:12:14.230 ‐ Look, this is actually a really good opportunity 00:12:14.230 --> 00:12:19.490 for them to see how amazing and kind and smart you are. 00:12:19.490 --> 00:12:21.490 You said it yourself, you're great with parents, 00:12:21.490 --> 00:12:24.530 so they're gonna meet you, they're gonna fall in love with you, 00:12:24.530 --> 00:12:27.790 and then that'll make it so much easier when I do tell them. 00:12:29.660 --> 00:12:31.670 Look... 00:12:34.000 --> 00:12:37.130 I get it, okay? 00:12:37.130 --> 00:12:40.220 I am asking a lot of you. 00:12:40.220 --> 00:12:42.890 But I promise I will tell them everything 00:12:42.890 --> 00:12:44.890 after the holidays. 00:12:52.520 --> 00:12:54.150 ‐ Okay, we can do this. 00:12:57.230 --> 00:12:58.900 It's five days. 00:12:58.900 --> 00:13:00.740 How bad can it be? 00:13:00.740 --> 00:13:02.740 [ "Jingle Bells" instrumental playing ] 00:13:12.920 --> 00:13:15.170 ABBY: Should I have some sort of cover story or something? 00:13:15.170 --> 00:13:16.340 HARPER: Oh, no, no. 00:13:16.340 --> 00:13:17.960 Just be you. ‐ Okay. 00:13:17.960 --> 00:13:19.710 ‐ I mean, but don't, you know, 00:13:19.710 --> 00:13:22.300 say that we're together, obviously, and, um... 00:13:22.300 --> 00:13:26.680 you know, maybe don't mention that you're, um... 00:13:26.680 --> 00:13:28.220 ‐ Gay? ‐ Yeah. 00:13:28.220 --> 00:13:31.140 Yeah, I think, actually, it might be better just to avoid it. 00:13:31.140 --> 00:13:32.440 But don't lie. 00:13:32.440 --> 00:13:34.400 You're a very bad liar. 00:13:34.400 --> 00:13:35.650 ‐ No, I'm not. 00:13:37.270 --> 00:13:39.610 ‐ Hi! ‐ Hi. 00:13:39.610 --> 00:13:41.110 ‐ Wait. 00:13:41.110 --> 00:13:42.490 ‐ Mom, what are you doing? [ camera clicking ] 00:13:42.490 --> 00:13:45.240 ‐ I started an Instagram feed 00:13:45.240 --> 00:13:49.040 for your father to give voters a peek behind the curtain. 00:13:49.040 --> 00:13:50.830 Your mother's going viral! 00:13:50.830 --> 00:13:52.460 ‐ [ all chuckle ] 00:13:52.460 --> 00:13:53.580 TIPPER: Hi! 00:13:53.580 --> 00:13:55.170 BOTH: Aw. 00:13:55.170 --> 00:13:57.130 ‐ Look at you. 00:13:57.130 --> 00:14:01.510 You get more and more beautiful every single time I see you. 00:14:01.510 --> 00:14:03.930 ‐ [ laughing ] Mom, stop. 00:14:03.930 --> 00:14:05.430 ‐ Did you bring concealer? 00:14:05.430 --> 00:14:07.140 ‐ Yeah. This is Abby. 00:14:07.140 --> 00:14:08.560 ‐ Hi, Abby. 00:14:08.560 --> 00:14:10.180 ‐ [ chuckles ] TIPPER: It is so nice to meet you. 00:14:10.180 --> 00:14:11.600 ‐ It's so nice to meet you, too. 00:14:11.600 --> 00:14:12.850 Thank you for having me here. 00:14:12.850 --> 00:14:14.270 ‐ It is nothing. 00:14:14.270 --> 00:14:18.650 Harper's father and I are always happy to open our doors to those in need. 00:14:18.650 --> 00:14:20.070 ‐ Where is Dad? 00:14:20.070 --> 00:14:22.440 ‐ Uh, he's on a call. ‐ Oh, okay. Well‐‐ 00:14:22.440 --> 00:14:24.150 ‐ Harper! ‐ [ gasping, yelling ] 00:14:24.150 --> 00:14:26.410 ‐ Oh, Jane. ‐ [ Jane laughing ] 00:14:26.410 --> 00:14:28.160 HARPER: Oh, I have asked you not to do that. 00:14:28.160 --> 00:14:29.660 ‐ I know. I didn't listen. 00:14:29.660 --> 00:14:31.490 JANE: Oh. Yay! HARPER: Oh. 00:14:31.490 --> 00:14:33.250 I didn't think you'd be here, but here you are. 00:14:33.250 --> 00:14:34.830 ‐ Oh, I didn't want to wait one more second 00:14:34.830 --> 00:14:36.210 to see my little sis. ‐ Oh, what's this? 00:14:36.210 --> 00:14:37.750 ‐ Oh, I was changing the air filters. ‐ It's sticky. 00:14:37.750 --> 00:14:39.750 ‐ Thank you, Jane. 00:14:39.750 --> 00:14:41.460 ‐ Yeah, hi. You must be Abby. 00:14:41.460 --> 00:14:44.220 ‐ Yeah. Nice to meet you. JANE: You, too. 00:14:44.220 --> 00:14:45.840 Um... 00:14:47.260 --> 00:14:50.050 I'm so sorry about your parents. 00:14:50.050 --> 00:14:51.470 HARPER: Oh, no. 00:14:51.470 --> 00:14:53.470 ‐ Uh, it‐it ha‐‐ It happened a long time ago. 00:14:54.850 --> 00:14:56.440 ‐ You're so brave. 00:14:56.440 --> 00:14:57.940 ABBY: Oh. JANE: You don't need to be. 00:14:57.940 --> 00:14:59.400 ‐ Jane. ‐ Mom, can you just‐‐ 00:14:59.400 --> 00:15:00.940 TIPPER: Okay. That's enough, Jane. 00:15:00.940 --> 00:15:03.530 Jane, too much. Too much. JANE: You're always safe with‐‐ 00:15:03.530 --> 00:15:06.110 ‐ So, this is our living room. 00:15:06.110 --> 00:15:07.990 ‐ Wow, that's a beautiful piano. 00:15:07.990 --> 00:15:09.320 ‐ Isn't it? 00:15:09.320 --> 00:15:11.370 Of course, I wish my daughters had bothered 00:15:11.370 --> 00:15:13.540 to learn to play it, but it does look nice. 00:15:13.540 --> 00:15:15.500 ‐ I took lessons for eight years. 00:15:15.500 --> 00:15:17.170 TIPPER: And this is the den. 00:15:17.170 --> 00:15:19.000 ‐ You're sure Harry will be there tomorrow night, right? 00:15:19.000 --> 00:15:20.040 Perfect. 00:15:20.040 --> 00:15:21.710 Oh, uh, Carolyn, I'll call you later. 00:15:21.710 --> 00:15:23.340 My daughter just arrived. 00:15:23.340 --> 00:15:25.170 There she is, my perfect girl. 00:15:25.170 --> 00:15:27.300 ‐ Hi, Dad. [ laughs ] ‐ Oh, look at you. 00:15:27.300 --> 00:15:29.890 BOTH: Oh! [ camera clicks ] 00:15:29.890 --> 00:15:32.310 ‐ Hi, Dad. ‐ Jane, glad you're here. 00:15:32.310 --> 00:15:34.600 The Internet has been a little spotty. 00:15:34.600 --> 00:15:36.600 ‐ Ugh, not again. 00:15:36.600 --> 00:15:39.230 ‐ Oh, and this is Harper's orphan friend. 00:15:39.230 --> 00:15:40.980 HARPER: Oh. ‐ This is Abby. 00:15:40.980 --> 00:15:42.730 ‐ Yes, of course. ABBY: Hey, sir. 00:15:42.730 --> 00:15:44.360 ‐ [ sighs ] Terrible. 00:15:44.360 --> 00:15:46.490 There, there. 00:15:46.490 --> 00:15:48.280 Harper, I read your piece about that senator. 00:15:48.280 --> 00:15:49.700 He's got to resign, right? 00:15:49.700 --> 00:15:51.490 HARPER: Yeah, I think it's just a matter of time. 00:15:51.490 --> 00:15:53.950 ‐ That was a good piece. ‐ Aw. 00:15:53.950 --> 00:15:54.950 Thanks, Dad. 00:15:54.950 --> 00:15:56.580 ‐ You know what was really good? 00:15:56.580 --> 00:15:58.960 Um, the speech that you made at the food bank on Thanksgiving. 00:15:58.960 --> 00:16:01.380 ‐ Oh, thank you. You‐you know, that speech wasn't scripted. 00:16:01.380 --> 00:16:02.960 I ju‐‐ It just came to me. 00:16:02.960 --> 00:16:04.590 ‐ You could tell. I mean, you were very‐‐ 00:16:04.590 --> 00:16:06.420 ‐ Okay, enough shoptalk. Let's continue. 00:16:06.420 --> 00:16:08.510 ‐ Okay. Bye. TED: See you later. 00:16:08.510 --> 00:16:11.050 ‐ And this is Sloane's room. 00:16:11.050 --> 00:16:13.300 She's my eldest. 00:16:13.300 --> 00:16:14.720 ‐ That's a lot of trophies. 00:16:14.720 --> 00:16:16.060 ‐ Yes. 00:16:16.060 --> 00:16:17.730 She was brilliant. 00:16:17.730 --> 00:16:19.440 She and her husband Eric‐‐ 00:16:19.440 --> 00:16:22.310 he graduated top of his class at Yale‐‐ 00:16:22.310 --> 00:16:25.020 were very successful attorneys, 00:16:25.020 --> 00:16:28.780 but they gave it all up to raise their beautiful twins, 00:16:28.780 --> 00:16:32.570 and now they make gift baskets. 00:16:35.120 --> 00:16:36.660 Which is great. 00:16:36.660 --> 00:16:38.120 HARPER: Mm‐hmm. 00:16:38.120 --> 00:16:40.710 ‐ What'd I miss? [ panting ] 00:16:44.090 --> 00:16:45.750 ‐ Wow. 00:16:45.750 --> 00:16:48.170 ‐ [ sighs ] I know, right? 00:16:48.170 --> 00:16:50.010 Ugh, is it hot in here, 00:16:50.010 --> 00:16:51.760 or is it just him? HARPER: Okay. 00:16:51.760 --> 00:16:53.430 ‐ Yummy, yummy, yummy. HARPER: Okay. 00:16:53.430 --> 00:16:55.760 ‐ No. Jane. No. ‐ Num, num. 00:16:55.760 --> 00:16:57.270 HARPER: Mom, I thought you were gonna 00:16:57.270 --> 00:16:58.980 turn this room into your office. 00:16:58.980 --> 00:17:01.230 ‐ Men need offices, dear. 00:17:01.230 --> 00:17:05.650 Oh, that is Harper's old high school boyfriend Connor! 00:17:05.650 --> 00:17:08.650 [ laughs ] HARPER: I asked you to put this away. 00:17:08.650 --> 00:17:10.530 TIPPER: You know, he's still single. 00:17:10.530 --> 00:17:12.490 HARPER: Okay, Mom, stop, please. TIPPER: Mm. 00:17:12.490 --> 00:17:14.240 Do you have a boyfriend, Abby? 00:17:14.240 --> 00:17:15.320 ‐ No. 00:17:15.320 --> 00:17:16.620 But I have. 00:17:16.620 --> 00:17:18.700 'Cause... I have had many. 00:17:18.700 --> 00:17:22.500 Um, but‐but not too many; an‐an appropriate amount. 00:17:22.500 --> 00:17:24.540 I actually just went through a breakup. 00:17:24.540 --> 00:17:26.920 ‐ Oh, no. TIPPER: Abby. 00:17:26.920 --> 00:17:28.590 ‐ [ sighs ] Yeah, with, um... 00:17:28.590 --> 00:17:31.170 He was a‐‐ He was a milk... man. 00:17:31.170 --> 00:17:34.050 ‐ Okay, and I think we'll just settle in now. 00:17:34.050 --> 00:17:37.720 ‐ Okay. Well, we'll just show Abby to her room. 00:17:37.720 --> 00:17:40.640 ‐ What, is she not gonna stay up here with me? 00:17:40.640 --> 00:17:44.900 ‐ Harper, I would never ask two grown women to share the same bed. 00:17:44.900 --> 00:17:46.810 [ laughing ] ‐ Harper. 00:17:46.810 --> 00:17:50.150 ‐ No, A‐Abby will stay in Jane's old room. 00:17:50.150 --> 00:17:51.610 ‐ Oh, oh, I could show it to her. ‐ Okay. 00:17:51.610 --> 00:17:52.820 ‐ I could take her down. Yeah, let's go. 00:17:52.820 --> 00:17:55.160 ‐ Settle down. JANE: I'm settled! 00:17:55.160 --> 00:17:57.740 ‐ Okay. [ door closes ] 00:17:59.910 --> 00:18:01.290 ‐ Oh. 00:18:01.290 --> 00:18:02.790 Your room's in the basement. 00:18:02.790 --> 00:18:04.290 ‐ Oh, yeah. I had night terrors. 00:18:04.290 --> 00:18:07.630 They put me down here so I wouldn't wake everyone up. [ chuckles ] 00:18:07.630 --> 00:18:09.920 Behold. [ chuckles ] 00:18:12.130 --> 00:18:13.760 Cool, huh? 00:18:13.760 --> 00:18:15.010 ‐ It's very cool. 00:18:15.010 --> 00:18:17.090 ‐ It's my room. 00:18:17.090 --> 00:18:18.810 ‐ Is everything okay? 00:18:18.810 --> 00:18:20.180 ‐ Yeah. Yeah. Really good. 00:18:20.180 --> 00:18:21.930 ‐ No, not you. No. ‐ Oh. 00:18:21.930 --> 00:18:23.430 ‐ Yeah. TIPPER: Thank you, Jane. 00:18:23.430 --> 00:18:27.020 Why don't you go on home and rest up a little bit before dinner? 00:18:27.020 --> 00:18:28.610 ‐ Okay. ‐ [ chuckles ] 00:18:28.610 --> 00:18:30.780 ‐ Don't have any fun without me. [ laughs ] 00:18:30.780 --> 00:18:33.150 ‐ Yeah. JANE: Bye. 00:18:33.150 --> 00:18:35.490 ‐ I'm sorry about all this mess. 00:18:35.490 --> 00:18:37.320 ‐ What? No, this is so nice. 00:18:37.320 --> 00:18:39.910 ‐ Better than your room at the orphanage? 00:18:39.910 --> 00:18:42.250 ‐ Oh, I‐I wasn't in an orphanage, 00:18:42.250 --> 00:18:44.960 'cause I‐I was 19 when my parents died. 00:18:44.960 --> 00:18:47.210 ‐ Oh. One of the lucky ones. 00:18:47.210 --> 00:18:48.380 ‐ Well... 00:18:48.380 --> 00:18:50.290 TIPPER: I'll let you settle in. 00:18:50.290 --> 00:18:52.460 We leave for dinner at 6:45. 00:18:52.460 --> 00:18:53.670 ‐ Okay. 00:18:53.670 --> 00:18:55.760 ‐ Oh, there's no lock on this door. 00:18:55.760 --> 00:18:58.010 We had it removed because Jane was always scared 00:18:58.010 --> 00:19:00.510 that we would lock her in. 00:19:00.510 --> 00:19:02.680 But don't worry, you'll have total privacy. 00:19:02.680 --> 00:19:04.480 ‐ Okay. [ chuckles ] Thank you. 00:19:04.480 --> 00:19:05.980 ‐ Okay. 00:19:07.020 --> 00:19:08.730 [ "Nothing Rhymes with Christmas" by Ana Gasteyer playing ] 00:19:08.730 --> 00:19:12.320 ♪ Nothing rhymes with Christmas ♪ 00:19:12.320 --> 00:19:14.320 ♪ Every poet knows... ♪ 00:19:14.320 --> 00:19:15.740 JANE: Milady. ABBY: Thank you. 00:19:16.780 --> 00:19:18.160 COLLEEN: Is this all right? 00:19:18.160 --> 00:19:19.740 ‐ This is perfect, Colleen. Thank you. 00:19:19.740 --> 00:19:22.290 ‐ Oh, actually, I think we're gonna need one more chair. 00:19:22.290 --> 00:19:23.580 COLLEEN: I'll have one brought over. 00:19:23.580 --> 00:19:25.290 ‐ Oh, who else is joining us? 00:19:25.290 --> 00:19:27.040 ‐ Hey, guys. How's it going? 00:19:27.040 --> 00:19:29.880 ‐ [ chuckling ] Connor! How funny to see you here. 00:19:29.880 --> 00:19:31.130 ‐ You told me to be here at 7:00, right? 00:19:31.130 --> 00:19:32.750 TIPPER: Shh. Oh, wow. JANE: Hey. CONNOR: How you doing? 00:19:32.750 --> 00:19:34.340 TED: Great to see you, Connor. 00:19:34.340 --> 00:19:35.380 ‐ Hey, Ted. How you doing? ‐ Great. 00:19:35.380 --> 00:19:37.130 ‐ Hi, Connor. CONNOR: Hi, Jane. 00:19:37.130 --> 00:19:38.430 Hi. It's been a minute. ‐ Hi. 00:19:38.430 --> 00:19:39.590 ‐ How are you? ‐ Yeah. Hey. 00:19:39.590 --> 00:19:41.600 ‐ Connor, this is Harper's friend Abby. 00:19:41.600 --> 00:19:43.220 CONNOR: Oh, hey. Connor. ‐ Hey. ‐ She's an orphan. 00:19:43.220 --> 00:19:45.140 ‐ Oh, um, I'm so sorry. ‐ Jane. 00:19:45.140 --> 00:19:46.390 CONNOR: I‐‐ ‐ What? ‐ What are you doing? 00:19:46.390 --> 00:19:47.560 ‐ She is. ‐ No, it's‐it's‐‐ 00:19:47.560 --> 00:19:48.560 ‐ It's all we have. 00:19:48.560 --> 00:19:49.770 TIPPER: All right. 00:19:49.770 --> 00:19:51.400 Thank you. Let's all take a seat. 00:19:51.400 --> 00:19:53.400 ‐ [ Harper sighing ] 00:19:55.990 --> 00:19:57.990 Do you want to switch? ‐ No. 00:19:57.990 --> 00:20:00.160 No, this is perfect. ‐ Okay. 00:20:00.160 --> 00:20:02.160 JANE: And then in the third chapter, the Shadow Dreamers 00:20:02.160 --> 00:20:05.160 discover that the gemstone that they thought was inside the gork 00:20:05.160 --> 00:20:08.330 was actually stolen by an evil floam, which is sort of like a maggel 00:20:08.330 --> 00:20:10.120 but with less arms and more powers. 00:20:10.120 --> 00:20:11.420 ‐ Oh, wow. 00:20:11.420 --> 00:20:12.840 That's amazing. It really is. 00:20:12.840 --> 00:20:15.000 ‐ Jane, I just can't believe you're still working on that book. 00:20:15.000 --> 00:20:16.050 It's been like ten years. 00:20:16.050 --> 00:20:17.670 ‐ Takes a long time to build a world. 00:20:17.670 --> 00:20:21.180 ‐ You know what I was thinking about the other day? 00:20:21.180 --> 00:20:23.720 I was thinking about that trip 00:20:23.720 --> 00:20:26.270 that we took to our old house in Jackson Hole 00:20:26.270 --> 00:20:28.600 when Harper got chicken pox. CONNOR: Oh, yeah. 00:20:28.600 --> 00:20:29.810 [ laughing ] Oh, God. 00:20:29.810 --> 00:20:31.190 ‐ Harper told me this story. 00:20:31.190 --> 00:20:35.320 ‐ Then you must know that she very quickly gave it to Connor. 00:20:35.320 --> 00:20:36.610 ‐ Yes, she did. ‐ [ laughter ] 00:20:36.610 --> 00:20:38.110 CONNOR: Very quickly. TED: The two of them 00:20:38.110 --> 00:20:40.070 didn't leave the cabin for the whole trip, 00:20:40.070 --> 00:20:41.530 if I remember correctly. CONNOR: No. ‐ Oh, my goodness. 00:20:41.530 --> 00:20:43.700 ‐ Literally in a cabin running a fever. 00:20:43.700 --> 00:20:44.950 TED: Yeah. ‐ Together. 00:20:44.950 --> 00:20:46.790 ‐ Together. Yep, yep. TIPPER: Really laughing a lot. 00:20:46.790 --> 00:20:48.540 CONNOR: It was ground zero for chicken pox. 00:20:48.540 --> 00:20:50.370 Yeah. God, that was fun. You know, I really, 00:20:50.370 --> 00:20:51.920 really loved going on those trips. ‐ Fun. 00:20:51.920 --> 00:20:53.790 ‐ Well, we loved having you, son. TIPPER: That was lovely. 00:20:53.790 --> 00:20:55.250 ‐ Should we go to the ladies' room? 00:20:55.250 --> 00:20:58.010 ‐ Oh, I‐I would hate to miss some of these stories. 00:20:58.010 --> 00:21:00.090 ‐ No, we'll be quick. 00:21:03.340 --> 00:21:05.970 ‐ [ chuckles ] ‐ I am so sorry. 00:21:05.970 --> 00:21:07.930 I had no idea he was gonna be here. 00:21:07.930 --> 00:21:09.390 I swear. 00:21:09.390 --> 00:21:11.350 ‐ It's funny, I remember you telling me that story. 00:21:11.350 --> 00:21:13.190 I think you just forgot to mention that Connor 00:21:13.190 --> 00:21:15.020 was also there. ‐ [ sighs ] I know. 00:21:15.020 --> 00:21:18.940 I‐I don't know, he didn't seem like an important part of the story. 00:21:18.940 --> 00:21:22.610 Look, I'm gonna talk to my mom, and I'm gonna make sure that 00:21:22.610 --> 00:21:25.450 nothing like this happens for the rest of the trip, okay? 00:21:26.990 --> 00:21:29.120 ‐ You can be totally honest with me. 00:21:29.120 --> 00:21:30.540 Like, about anything. 00:21:30.540 --> 00:21:32.250 Seriously, I can take it. 00:21:33.290 --> 00:21:35.000 ‐ Okay. 00:21:36.590 --> 00:21:39.090 Then you should know that it is very difficult 00:21:39.090 --> 00:21:42.090 to sit next to you at dinner and not be able to kiss you. 00:21:47.140 --> 00:21:48.850 ‐ Yeah. 00:21:49.890 --> 00:21:51.730 ‐ No more surprises. 00:21:51.730 --> 00:21:53.350 I promise. 00:21:57.770 --> 00:22:00.150 Riley. RILEY: Mm. 00:22:00.150 --> 00:22:01.940 Harper. 00:22:02.950 --> 00:22:04.910 ‐ Mm. Uh... 00:22:04.910 --> 00:22:06.570 ‐ Sorry, um... 00:22:06.570 --> 00:22:08.080 Riley, this is Abby. 00:22:08.080 --> 00:22:09.950 Abby is my‐‐ ‐ Orphan. 00:22:09.950 --> 00:22:11.370 Roommate. We‐‐ 00:22:11.370 --> 00:22:13.330 I am an orphan, but we live together. 00:22:13.330 --> 00:22:14.620 As friends, um, like acquaintances. 00:22:14.620 --> 00:22:16.380 ‐ Oh, please stop. ‐ Yeah. 00:22:16.380 --> 00:22:18.090 ‐ Nice to meet you. 00:22:18.090 --> 00:22:20.170 So, I'm just gonna sneak on by you guys. 00:22:20.170 --> 00:22:21.380 ‐ Oh, God. Sorry. 00:22:21.380 --> 00:22:23.300 Sorry. Just... 00:22:25.300 --> 00:22:26.930 ‐ Was that the Riley? 00:22:26.930 --> 00:22:30.010 ‐ Okay, that one really wasn't my fault. 00:22:30.010 --> 00:22:31.640 ‐ Well, who knows, maybe... 00:22:31.640 --> 00:22:34.270 maybe another one of your exes will bring out dessert. 00:22:34.270 --> 00:22:36.650 ‐ Okay. ‐ Oh, my God. 00:22:36.650 --> 00:22:39.730 ‐ Harper, did you see that the Bennetts are here? 00:22:39.730 --> 00:22:40.860 HARPER: Uh... 00:22:42.400 --> 00:22:43.990 Yeah. We just ran into Riley. 00:22:43.990 --> 00:22:45.910 ‐ Did you hear she's doing her residency at Johns Hopkins? 00:22:45.910 --> 00:22:47.780 ‐ I should have her look at my mole. 00:22:47.780 --> 00:22:50.530 ‐ No, um, I hadn't heard that. 00:22:50.530 --> 00:22:52.080 ‐ It's very impressive. 00:22:52.080 --> 00:22:53.790 Her parents must be proud. 00:22:53.790 --> 00:22:55.330 And relieved. 00:22:55.330 --> 00:22:57.170 ‐ I know. That lifestyle choice. 00:22:57.170 --> 00:22:59.540 [ Tipper chuckles ] TED: Mm. Such a shame. 00:22:59.540 --> 00:23:00.630 ‐ Abby, what do you do? 00:23:00.630 --> 00:23:05.550 ‐ Oh, I'm‐I'm working on my PhD in art history over at Carnegie Mellon. 00:23:05.550 --> 00:23:07.220 My parents were professors there, 00:23:07.220 --> 00:23:09.680 so I kind of wanted to follow in their footsteps. 00:23:09.680 --> 00:23:11.760 ‐ You know, before law school, 00:23:11.760 --> 00:23:15.480 I took all the money I had and went to Paris for a month. 00:23:15.480 --> 00:23:17.770 Spent every day in museums. 00:23:17.770 --> 00:23:20.560 That experience made me the man I am. 00:23:20.560 --> 00:23:22.070 ‐ That‐that must have been incredible. 00:23:22.070 --> 00:23:23.230 What a dream. 00:23:23.230 --> 00:23:25.320 ‐ It was. 00:23:25.320 --> 00:23:27.860 Boy, Carnegie Mellon, huh? 00:23:27.860 --> 00:23:29.780 Bet you could teach me a thing or two. 00:23:29.780 --> 00:23:31.240 ‐ [ chuckles ] JANE: Should I go over there? 00:23:31.240 --> 00:23:32.370 TED: No, darling, no. 00:23:32.370 --> 00:23:33.700 JANE: I do think it's getting bigger. 00:23:33.700 --> 00:23:35.200 TIPPER: No. TED: Stay at the table, Jane. 00:23:38.920 --> 00:23:40.040 [ knocking ] 00:23:42.090 --> 00:23:44.630 ‐ Oh. You settling in okay? ABBY: Hey. 00:23:44.630 --> 00:23:46.050 Yeah. Yeah. 00:23:46.050 --> 00:23:49.640 You're such a wonderful host, so I'm great. 00:23:49.640 --> 00:23:51.260 ‐ Thank you, Abby. 00:23:51.260 --> 00:23:52.510 Thank you. 00:23:52.510 --> 00:23:53.810 ‐ Hi. ‐ Hi, sweetie. 00:23:53.810 --> 00:23:55.220 Do you need something? 00:23:55.220 --> 00:23:57.180 ‐ No, just to say good night to Abby. 00:23:57.180 --> 00:23:58.890 ‐ Oh. 00:24:00.600 --> 00:24:02.230 ‐ Mom, do you mind? 00:24:02.230 --> 00:24:04.020 ‐ Oh. [ laughs ] 00:24:04.020 --> 00:24:05.780 I get it. Girl talk. 00:24:05.780 --> 00:24:07.530 Okay, when you finish, um, 00:24:07.530 --> 00:24:09.610 I want to give you a little early Christmas present. 00:24:09.610 --> 00:24:10.820 ‐ Ooh, okay. 00:24:10.820 --> 00:24:12.410 ‐ Night. TIPPER: Night, Abby. 00:24:14.950 --> 00:24:16.700 ‐ [ sighs ] 00:24:18.460 --> 00:24:20.460 Tonight wasn't the best. 00:24:20.460 --> 00:24:22.040 ‐ Yeah. 00:24:22.040 --> 00:24:23.590 But we got through it. 00:24:23.590 --> 00:24:25.210 ‐ You know, you're right. 00:24:25.210 --> 00:24:27.210 You are really good with parents. 00:24:27.210 --> 00:24:28.920 ‐ You think they like me? 00:24:28.920 --> 00:24:30.630 ‐ Definitely. 00:24:30.630 --> 00:24:33.680 ‐ You think they like me as much as they love Connor? 00:24:33.680 --> 00:24:36.060 ‐ Oh, no. No, no. 00:24:36.060 --> 00:24:38.430 But they don't even really like me that much, so... 00:24:38.430 --> 00:24:40.100 ‐ [ laughing ] Oh. 00:24:40.100 --> 00:24:41.560 ‐ [ Harper mutters ] 00:24:45.440 --> 00:24:47.440 I love you. ‐ I love you. 00:24:49.650 --> 00:24:51.660 [ chuckling ] Stop it. ‐ [ laughs ] 00:24:52.820 --> 00:24:55.030 JOHN: The hell did it go? 00:24:55.030 --> 00:24:57.870 Cheap freaking puzzle. 00:24:57.870 --> 00:24:59.870 [ cell phone vibrating ] 00:24:59.870 --> 00:25:02.210 Yeah, Abby, I'm in the middle of something right now. 00:25:02.210 --> 00:25:03.830 Is everything okay? ABBY: Yeah. 00:25:03.830 --> 00:25:04.880 I'm just checking on the animals. 00:25:04.880 --> 00:25:05.880 JOHN: Oh, they're all good. 00:25:05.880 --> 00:25:07.000 I walked the dog. 00:25:07.000 --> 00:25:08.260 Fed him, fed the cats. 00:25:08.260 --> 00:25:10.260 All are well. ABBY: What about the fish? 00:25:11.300 --> 00:25:12.840 ‐ Uh, the fish are‐‐ Yeah. 00:25:12.840 --> 00:25:15.220 The‐the‐the fish are‐are‐‐ Yes. Yeah. 00:25:15.220 --> 00:25:16.390 But enough about me. 00:25:16.390 --> 00:25:17.390 Have you managed 00:25:17.390 --> 00:25:21.940 to get a man's permission to take ownership of an adult human woman yet? 00:25:21.940 --> 00:25:23.350 ‐ Not exactly. 00:25:23.350 --> 00:25:24.770 ‐ What's going on? You sound tense. 00:25:24.770 --> 00:25:26.270 ABBY: No, I'm not tense. I'm great. 00:25:26.270 --> 00:25:28.280 There's just one tiny thing. 00:25:28.280 --> 00:25:29.940 Um... 00:25:31.740 --> 00:25:34.110 Harper isn't out, and her parents don't know we're together. 00:25:34.110 --> 00:25:37.280 ‐ Okay, you know what, I always felt like something was off. 00:25:37.280 --> 00:25:39.200 You can't go over a year without meeting 00:25:39.200 --> 00:25:40.450 your significant other's parents. 00:25:40.450 --> 00:25:41.620 Trust me, I have tried. 00:25:41.620 --> 00:25:43.040 ‐ I know, but it's not that big of a deal, 00:25:43.040 --> 00:25:45.380 'cause she does plan on telling them immediately after the holidays. 00:25:45.380 --> 00:25:48.250 ‐ So, what, her parents are believing that their straight daughter 00:25:48.250 --> 00:25:51.420 brought home her lesbian friend for Christmas? 00:25:51.420 --> 00:25:52.720 ‐ No. [ scoffs ] 00:25:52.720 --> 00:25:56.140 No. They also think that I'm... 00:25:56.140 --> 00:25:58.260 that I'm straight. 00:25:58.260 --> 00:26:00.020 ‐ Have they ever met a lesbian? 00:26:00.020 --> 00:26:01.310 ‐ It's not so bad. 00:26:01.310 --> 00:26:03.230 It's kind of fun having a secret. 00:26:03.230 --> 00:26:04.850 ‐ Yeah, I mean, there's nothing more erotic 00:26:04.850 --> 00:26:06.690 than concealing your authentic selves. 00:26:06.690 --> 00:26:09.860 ‐ I know it's not ideal. I‐‐ 00:26:09.860 --> 00:26:12.400 But I‐I know that it's what she needs right now, so... 00:26:20.450 --> 00:26:22.660 [ gasps ] 00:26:22.660 --> 00:26:24.120 ‐ Who are you? 00:26:24.120 --> 00:26:26.210 ‐ I'm Abby. 00:26:26.210 --> 00:26:27.920 ‐ Do you work here? 00:26:27.920 --> 00:26:29.550 ‐ No, I'm H‐Harper's friend. 00:26:29.550 --> 00:26:31.550 SLOANE: Kids? 00:26:31.550 --> 00:26:33.130 Where are you? 00:26:33.130 --> 00:26:35.130 Hey. 00:26:35.130 --> 00:26:37.220 What are you doing in here? Out. 00:26:38.800 --> 00:26:40.720 MATILDA: But that's our room. 00:26:40.720 --> 00:26:42.270 ‐ Sorry about them. I'm Sloane. 00:26:42.270 --> 00:26:44.100 MATILDA: Why does she get to sleep in there? 00:26:44.100 --> 00:26:46.850 ‐ Hi. I'm... SLOANE: Because she's a grown‐up, sweetie. 00:26:46.850 --> 00:26:48.520 ‐ ...Abby. 00:26:48.520 --> 00:26:50.860 SLOANE: [ in distance ] Come. We're having breakfast. 00:27:03.540 --> 00:27:04.870 ‐ [ yawns ] 00:27:04.870 --> 00:27:06.460 ‐ Are you tired? 00:27:06.460 --> 00:27:08.080 Not me. I like the morning. 00:27:08.080 --> 00:27:11.340 But then I have something meaningful to get out of bed for, so... 00:27:11.340 --> 00:27:13.590 KIDS: Thank you, Mommy. 00:27:13.590 --> 00:27:15.090 ‐ Snowman pancakes. 00:27:15.090 --> 00:27:18.300 God, that's a lot of work for something that's just gonna turn to shit. 00:27:18.300 --> 00:27:20.140 Oh, but that's kind of like your law degree. 00:27:20.140 --> 00:27:22.220 ‐ It must be freeing to be so self‐involved 00:27:22.220 --> 00:27:24.220 you don't realize that's actually not appropriate language 00:27:24.220 --> 00:27:25.430 to use in front of children. 00:27:25.430 --> 00:27:26.810 ERIC: We got everything out of the van. 00:27:27.850 --> 00:27:29.150 ‐ Thank you, honey. ‐ Mm‐hmm. 00:27:29.150 --> 00:27:31.230 ‐ Oh, this is‐‐ ‐ Abby. I'm Eric. 00:27:31.230 --> 00:27:32.690 ‐ Nice to meet you. ERIC: Mm‐hmm. 00:27:32.690 --> 00:27:36.280 A teaspoon of coconut oil‐‐ add some nice moisture to those hands. 00:27:36.280 --> 00:27:37.860 ‐ Oh. 00:27:37.860 --> 00:27:39.200 Yeah, thank you. 00:27:42.370 --> 00:27:45.450 So, you and your sister are pretty intense. 00:27:45.450 --> 00:27:47.830 ‐ What do you mean? 00:27:47.830 --> 00:27:49.000 ‐ Freeze! ERIC: Ooh. 00:27:49.000 --> 00:27:52.670 ‐ Don't move one more muscle before I hug you! 00:27:52.670 --> 00:27:54.420 ‐ Hi, Jane. JANE: Oh. Oh, hi. 00:27:54.420 --> 00:27:55.880 ‐ Oh. Yay. ‐ [ Jane laughs ] 00:27:55.880 --> 00:27:56.970 ‐ [ Sloane clears throat ] 00:27:56.970 --> 00:27:58.930 JANE: Hi, Eric. Hi. ERIC: Hi, Jane. 00:27:58.930 --> 00:28:01.800 ‐ Hi, you guys. Hi. 00:28:01.800 --> 00:28:03.060 Um... [ chuckles ] 00:28:03.060 --> 00:28:04.720 Gosh, you're so big. 00:28:04.720 --> 00:28:06.680 What are you, college students? 00:28:06.680 --> 00:28:09.140 ‐ We're in elementary school. 00:28:09.140 --> 00:28:11.270 ‐ Yeah. No, I‐I know. I'm just‐‐ 00:28:11.270 --> 00:28:13.360 You're just so tall, you know? 00:28:13.360 --> 00:28:14.900 ‐ Here they are. ‐ My babies. 00:28:16.610 --> 00:28:19.030 Aw... 00:28:19.030 --> 00:28:21.070 ‐ Hi, Daddy. ‐ Did you get Harper's article I sent you? 00:28:21.070 --> 00:28:22.950 SLOANE: I did. TED: Good, right? 00:28:22.950 --> 00:28:24.120 ‐ Mm. Mm‐hmm. Mm. ‐ Uh‐huh. 00:28:24.120 --> 00:28:25.870 ERIC: Ted. ‐ Eric. 00:28:25.870 --> 00:28:27.330 Good to see you. SLOANE: Hi, Mom. 00:28:27.330 --> 00:28:28.500 TIPPER: [ chuckling ] Hi. 00:28:28.500 --> 00:28:30.290 ‐ Morning. ‐ Morning, Abby. 00:28:30.290 --> 00:28:32.840 Hey, girls, come here. TIPPER: I'm good. ERIC: Hi. 00:28:32.840 --> 00:28:34.290 ‐ Just‐just‐just come over here. 00:28:34.290 --> 00:28:36.000 TIPPER: Just move a bit. TED: I cannot believe 00:28:36.000 --> 00:28:39.260 I've got all my daughters under one roof. 00:28:39.260 --> 00:28:41.220 Mm, mm. ‐ This is great content. 00:28:41.220 --> 00:28:42.680 ‐ Oh. ‐ Hold it. Hold it. 00:28:42.680 --> 00:28:43.680 ‐ And smile. TED: Hold on. 00:28:43.680 --> 00:28:45.470 JANE: Daddy. ‐ Uh‐huh. Uh‐huh. ‐ Got it. 00:28:45.470 --> 00:28:47.140 ‐ Okay. I got to shower. 00:28:47.140 --> 00:28:49.140 Hey, big night tonight, girls. ‐ That's too much. 00:28:49.140 --> 00:28:50.810 ‐ We're meeting a major donor at the party. 00:28:50.810 --> 00:28:52.650 Harper, I need you to bring your A game. 00:28:52.650 --> 00:28:54.730 ‐ Got it. ‐ Dad, do you need me to do anything? 00:28:54.730 --> 00:28:56.150 ‐ Honey, no. 00:28:56.150 --> 00:28:59.070 You just bring that beautiful family and show them off. 00:28:59.070 --> 00:29:00.490 Who knows? 00:29:00.490 --> 00:29:02.780 These might be the only grandchildren we ever have. 00:29:02.780 --> 00:29:05.330 TIPPER: And it is crucial that we take 00:29:05.330 --> 00:29:08.500 the family holiday photo for the Instagram tonight, 00:29:08.500 --> 00:29:12.210 so don't wear anything that will strobe, Jane. 00:29:12.210 --> 00:29:14.840 ‐ [ Jane chuckles softly ] 00:29:14.840 --> 00:29:16.840 [ sighs ] 00:29:16.840 --> 00:29:18.460 Okay. 00:29:18.460 --> 00:29:21.550 Who's ready to go ice‐skating? 00:29:21.550 --> 00:29:23.760 Are you ready? [ chuckles ] ‐ No. 00:29:23.760 --> 00:29:25.760 ♪ upbeat holiday music ♪ 00:29:30.270 --> 00:29:32.480 ‐ Let me know if you guys need any more room. 00:29:32.480 --> 00:29:35.020 I can make myself real small. 00:29:36.060 --> 00:29:39.280 ‐ So, Sloane and Eric, you guys make gift baskets, right? 00:29:39.280 --> 00:29:40.610 ‐ No. 00:29:40.610 --> 00:29:43.200 We create curated gift experiences 00:29:43.200 --> 00:29:45.620 inside of handmade reclaimed wood vessels. 00:29:45.620 --> 00:29:47.200 ‐ Yeah, the vessels are gorgeous. 00:29:47.200 --> 00:29:48.200 She has impeccable taste. 00:29:48.200 --> 00:29:50.200 ‐ Oh, no, honey, you have the eye. 00:29:50.200 --> 00:29:51.580 ‐ Aw. ‐ Mm. 00:29:51.580 --> 00:29:52.920 ‐ That sounds great. 00:29:52.920 --> 00:29:54.330 SLOANE: Yeah, Gwynnie seems to think so. 00:29:54.330 --> 00:29:56.130 Paltrow. Goop picked us up, 00:29:56.130 --> 00:29:58.090 and sales have been through the roof ever since. 00:29:59.130 --> 00:30:00.380 ‐ [ Harper sighs ] 00:30:00.380 --> 00:30:02.760 ‐ [ lively chatter ] 00:30:06.930 --> 00:30:08.100 HARPER: Hey. 00:30:08.100 --> 00:30:09.470 ‐ Hey. 00:30:09.470 --> 00:30:11.430 ‐ Are you sure you're okay? ‐ Yeah. 00:30:11.430 --> 00:30:13.020 No, this is so fun. 00:30:13.020 --> 00:30:14.390 ‐ Whoa. 00:30:14.390 --> 00:30:16.770 ‐ Sloane, do you need a helper? 00:30:16.770 --> 00:30:19.400 ‐ Please. I've always skated circles around you. 00:30:19.400 --> 00:30:21.740 ‐ [ chuckles ] That was in your youth. 00:30:21.740 --> 00:30:23.570 I mean, I've lapped you like 12 times today. 00:30:23.570 --> 00:30:26.410 ‐ Like I'm even trying. ‐ Like it would even matter. 00:30:26.410 --> 00:30:28.660 ‐ 20 bucks says I can do two laps in under a minute. 00:30:28.660 --> 00:30:30.240 ‐ 50 bucks says I can do three. 00:30:30.240 --> 00:30:31.830 ‐ Let's do it. Jane, time us. 00:30:31.830 --> 00:30:33.250 ‐ Oh, I'm actually having fun just‐‐ 00:30:33.250 --> 00:30:36.040 BOTH: Jane. ‐ Okay, fun. Yeah. 00:30:36.040 --> 00:30:37.830 No problem. 00:30:37.830 --> 00:30:40.250 ♪ tense music ♪ 00:30:41.380 --> 00:30:42.380 JANE: Ready? 00:30:43.420 --> 00:30:45.380 Set. 00:30:45.380 --> 00:30:46.680 Go. ‐ [ both grunt ] 00:30:49.220 --> 00:30:50.140 ‐ [ chuckles ] 00:30:51.220 --> 00:30:52.640 ‐ Move! ‐ No! 00:30:52.640 --> 00:30:54.480 ‐ I love it when they do this. 00:30:55.640 --> 00:30:57.020 ERIC: What are they doing? ‐ They're racing. 00:30:57.020 --> 00:30:58.310 ‐ Ah, yeah. 00:30:58.310 --> 00:31:01.110 ‐ Jane, time! ‐ Oh, I forgot to press start. 00:31:01.110 --> 00:31:03.110 How long do you guys think‐‐ ‐ Don't‐don't tell them that. 00:31:03.110 --> 00:31:04.740 ‐ You need to take a break yet, Sloane? 00:31:04.740 --> 00:31:05.860 ‐ Huh, maybe you should just 00:31:05.860 --> 00:31:07.490 worry about yourself. ‐ Oh, yeah? 00:31:08.200 --> 00:31:09.740 [ yelps ] ‐ [ man grunts ] 00:31:09.740 --> 00:31:10.990 ‐ Oh! ‐ Ooh. 00:31:10.990 --> 00:31:12.290 ‐ [ chuckles ] 00:31:12.290 --> 00:31:14.250 [ yelps, screams ] ‐ [ man grunts ] 00:31:14.250 --> 00:31:15.710 ‐ Mm. ‐ Ow. 00:31:15.710 --> 00:31:17.040 ABBY: Should we stop them? 00:31:17.040 --> 00:31:19.250 ERIC: No, they'll tire themselves out eventually. 00:31:19.250 --> 00:31:20.290 ‐ [ laughing ] Yeah. That's right. 00:31:20.290 --> 00:31:21.460 ‐ That's the way it goes. HARPER: Whoo! 00:31:21.460 --> 00:31:22.880 Get off me! 00:31:22.880 --> 00:31:24.300 ‐ I love you guys. I love you. 00:31:24.300 --> 00:31:25.760 HARPER: No! You're such a cheater! 00:31:25.760 --> 00:31:27.680 ‐ Stop it! [ shouts ] ‐ You stop it! 00:31:27.680 --> 00:31:29.010 ‐ ...a little restless. ‐ They're gonna need to turn around. 00:31:29.010 --> 00:31:30.600 ‐ Look, some of us were here when you said to be here. 00:31:30.600 --> 00:31:32.510 ‐ Jane, is that‐‐ That's what you're wearing, right? ‐ Yeah. 00:31:32.510 --> 00:31:34.390 TIPPER: All right. Harper! 00:31:34.390 --> 00:31:36.770 Eric, can you make them be still? 00:31:36.770 --> 00:31:38.600 ‐ Wow. 00:31:38.600 --> 00:31:40.360 ‐ It's my early Christmas present. 00:31:40.360 --> 00:31:42.520 TIPPER: Harper, please come here. 00:31:42.520 --> 00:31:43.780 ‐ Honey, we're very late. 00:31:43.780 --> 00:31:45.740 ‐ Ted, the family holiday photo 00:31:45.740 --> 00:31:48.160 is an essential element of every candidate's feed, 00:31:48.160 --> 00:31:50.990 and if we cannot manage to post one, 00:31:50.990 --> 00:31:53.700 we do not deserve to have that account at all. 00:31:53.700 --> 00:31:55.040 TED: All right. Up, up, up, kids. ‐ That is so true. 00:31:55.040 --> 00:31:56.250 TIPPER: Jane, get out of the middle. ‐ Come on, Matilda. 00:31:56.250 --> 00:31:57.620 ‐ Oh. SLOANE: You have to stand, honey. 00:31:57.620 --> 00:31:59.580 TIPPER: Abby, would you mind taking that? 00:31:59.580 --> 00:32:01.250 ‐ Yeah, not at all. ‐ Oh, thank you. 00:32:01.250 --> 00:32:04.050 ‐ Okay, here we go. Here we go. ‐ Around and face this way. 00:32:04.050 --> 00:32:05.460 Thank you. ‐ Okay. 00:32:05.460 --> 00:32:07.800 ‐ Everyone say, "Christmas." 00:32:07.800 --> 00:32:09.220 ‐ No, don't say that. 00:32:09.220 --> 00:32:10.550 Just smile. 00:32:10.550 --> 00:32:12.550 [ camera clicking ] 00:32:12.550 --> 00:32:14.260 ‐ Okay. ‐ [ Tipper chuckling ] 00:32:14.260 --> 00:32:16.310 Ah, good. I can't wait. 00:32:16.310 --> 00:32:19.230 Blurry. Boring. 00:32:19.230 --> 00:32:20.940 Nope. Nope. Nope. 00:32:20.940 --> 00:32:22.860 Okay, none of these will do. 00:32:22.860 --> 00:32:25.730 Uh, we will try again tomorrow. 00:32:25.730 --> 00:32:27.820 Thank you. HARPER: Where's Abby? 00:32:27.820 --> 00:32:29.820 ♪ upbeat holiday music ♪ 00:32:31.870 --> 00:32:33.870 ‐ [ quiet chatter ] 00:32:46.210 --> 00:32:48.590 ‐ Ted, Tipper. [ laughs, squeals ] 00:32:48.590 --> 00:32:50.680 Oh, I'm so glad you made it. 00:32:50.680 --> 00:32:52.890 Oh, mwah. Oh. ‐ Carolyn, you are a vision. 00:32:52.890 --> 00:32:54.680 TIPPER: Gorgeous dress. TED: Mwah. 00:32:54.680 --> 00:32:57.270 Uh, you remember my daughters Harper, Jane and Sloane. 00:32:57.270 --> 00:32:58.520 Sloane's husband Eric. 00:32:58.520 --> 00:33:00.520 Their children Matilda and Magnus. 00:33:00.520 --> 00:33:02.850 And this is Harper's friend Abby. 00:33:02.850 --> 00:33:05.150 CAROLYN: Charmed. This is my assistant Levi. 00:33:05.150 --> 00:33:08.780 Though, truth be told, in a few years, we'll probably all be working for him. 00:33:08.780 --> 00:33:10.320 ‐ [ laughs ] Oh, you're too kind. 00:33:10.320 --> 00:33:11.820 ‐ Oh. ‐ Is the white whale here? 00:33:11.820 --> 00:33:13.240 ‐ Ah, indeed. Let me take you over. 00:33:13.240 --> 00:33:15.370 ‐ Oh, Harper, come with us. 00:33:15.370 --> 00:33:16.790 Uh, Jane, uh, uh, keep Abby company. 00:33:16.790 --> 00:33:18.500 ‐ You got it. ‐ Dad, should I come, too? 00:33:18.500 --> 00:33:20.250 ‐ I'll come right back. ‐ Okay. TED: N‐No, honey. 00:33:20.250 --> 00:33:22.330 Just, uh, enjoy yourself. ‐ Great. 00:33:22.330 --> 00:33:23.710 CAROLYN: Now, Harry's tough. 00:33:23.710 --> 00:33:24.960 Don't let her throw you. 00:33:24.960 --> 00:33:26.800 ‐ I'm gonna take the twins to the kids' club. 00:33:26.800 --> 00:33:28.130 Please order me several drinks. 00:33:28.130 --> 00:33:29.170 ‐ Yeah. 00:33:29.170 --> 00:33:30.470 ‐ Come on, you guys. 00:33:30.470 --> 00:33:32.050 Let's go play. 00:33:32.050 --> 00:33:34.180 JANE: Okay. Well... 00:33:34.180 --> 00:33:36.430 looks like it's just us ladies. 00:33:36.430 --> 00:33:38.850 Now, I don't know about you, but I am single 00:33:38.850 --> 00:33:41.440 and ready to mingle, so... 00:33:42.850 --> 00:33:45.110 CAROLYN: Harry. 00:33:45.110 --> 00:33:47.770 This is‐‐ ‐ Ted Caldwell. 00:33:47.770 --> 00:33:50.030 ‐ Ms. Levin, it is an honor. ‐ [ Harry chuckles ] 00:33:50.030 --> 00:33:51.820 ‐ I am gonna leave you two to get acquainted. 00:33:51.820 --> 00:33:52.950 ‐ Okay. Thank you. 00:33:52.950 --> 00:33:54.610 This is my husband Scott. 00:33:54.610 --> 00:33:56.660 We met on Bumble. [ chuckles ] TED: Pleasure. 00:33:56.660 --> 00:33:58.290 And, uh, this is my wife Tipper. 00:33:58.290 --> 00:34:00.000 My daughter Harper, who writes for the‐‐ 00:34:00.000 --> 00:34:01.410 ‐ Pittsburgh Post‐Gazette. 00:34:01.410 --> 00:34:02.790 HARPER: Yes. ‐ Yes, I'm familiar. 00:34:02.790 --> 00:34:04.290 ‐ You've read her work? 00:34:04.290 --> 00:34:06.250 ‐ Yes. 00:34:08.960 --> 00:34:11.260 ♪ lively jazz music ♪ 00:34:11.260 --> 00:34:13.930 ‐ Hey, could I get a vodka neat? 00:34:13.930 --> 00:34:15.640 Thanks. 00:34:19.010 --> 00:34:20.020 ‐ You're new. 00:34:21.770 --> 00:34:24.850 ‐ Yeah, I'm just visiting. ‐ From where? 00:34:24.850 --> 00:34:27.020 ‐ I'm really not interested in meeting anyone tonight, so‐‐ 00:34:27.020 --> 00:34:28.320 ‐ I am. 00:34:29.520 --> 00:34:31.360 CAROLYN: Oh, I'll have to check out Goop. 00:34:31.360 --> 00:34:33.360 Was that‐‐ When was that one, again? 00:34:33.360 --> 00:34:36.660 ‐ [ quiet, indistinct chatter ] 00:34:48.420 --> 00:34:50.050 ‐ Are you enjoying the party? 00:34:50.050 --> 00:34:52.210 ‐ Yeah. 00:34:52.210 --> 00:34:53.840 SLOANE: That's great. 00:34:53.840 --> 00:34:56.720 If my friend ditched me at a party where I didn't know anyone, 00:34:56.720 --> 00:34:58.510 I probably wouldn't have a good time. 00:34:58.510 --> 00:34:59.680 ‐ Oh, no, sh‐she didn't ditch me. 00:34:59.680 --> 00:35:00.970 No, she's just helping your dad. 00:35:00.970 --> 00:35:03.270 ‐ Yeah, she's very helpful. 00:35:04.770 --> 00:35:07.480 So, how long have you and Harper been roommates? 00:35:07.480 --> 00:35:09.730 ‐ I moved in like six months ago. 00:35:09.730 --> 00:35:11.320 ‐ You moved in to her place? 00:35:11.320 --> 00:35:12.440 ‐ Mm‐hmm. 00:35:12.440 --> 00:35:14.280 ‐ Isn't it a one‐bedroom? 00:35:14.280 --> 00:35:15.990 ‐ Technically, yes. 00:35:15.990 --> 00:35:17.450 Yeah, well, it was a one‐bedroom, 00:35:17.450 --> 00:35:20.280 and‐and now that we have converted the pantry 00:35:20.280 --> 00:35:22.990 i‐into my bedroom, it's a two‐bedroom. 00:35:22.990 --> 00:35:25.210 Um, it's really spacious in there, and it's‐‐ 00:35:25.210 --> 00:35:27.080 ‐ I don't want to have this conversation anymore. 00:35:27.080 --> 00:35:28.710 ‐ No problem. 00:35:30.090 --> 00:35:32.130 ‐ Being mayor is no small task. 00:35:32.130 --> 00:35:35.760 However, it's a task I am not only up for but eager to take on. 00:35:35.760 --> 00:35:37.380 HARRY: I'm gonna stop you right there. 00:35:37.380 --> 00:35:39.300 I have a perfect record. 00:35:39.300 --> 00:35:40.720 And do you know why? 00:35:40.720 --> 00:35:42.510 Because I do my homework. 00:35:42.510 --> 00:35:44.520 Last election, I almost backed Dave Grady. 00:35:44.520 --> 00:35:46.770 ‐ Dave Grady? Didn't his son‐‐ 00:35:46.770 --> 00:35:48.650 ‐ Get arrested for exotic animal smuggling? 00:35:48.650 --> 00:35:49.770 Yes. 00:35:49.770 --> 00:35:54.110 I'm telling you this because I'm not just looking at you. 00:35:54.110 --> 00:35:55.440 This is a family affair. 00:35:55.440 --> 00:35:57.530 ‐ Well, I can assure you, 00:35:57.530 --> 00:36:01.200 this family has nothing to hide. 00:36:03.990 --> 00:36:06.370 ♪ upbeat jazz music ♪ 00:36:11.920 --> 00:36:13.590 ‐ Hey. ‐ Hey. Hey. 00:36:13.590 --> 00:36:15.420 ‐ Hi. Can I have a sip of your drink? 00:36:15.420 --> 00:36:17.420 ‐ Yeah, of course. ‐ Thank you. 00:36:18.720 --> 00:36:20.010 Mm. ‐ You okay? 00:36:20.010 --> 00:36:21.220 ‐ Mm‐hmm. 00:36:21.220 --> 00:36:23.220 I just needed a bit of a breather. 00:36:23.220 --> 00:36:24.560 Thank you. 00:36:24.560 --> 00:36:25.810 KELLY: Harper? 00:36:25.810 --> 00:36:27.100 HARPER: Mm! ‐ [ squealing ] 00:36:27.100 --> 00:36:28.560 ASHLEY: Hi! 00:36:28.560 --> 00:36:29.940 ‐ [ laughing ] Hi. 00:36:29.940 --> 00:36:31.650 You look incredible. 00:36:31.650 --> 00:36:33.730 ‐ As always. ‐ Oh, my God. 00:36:33.730 --> 00:36:35.780 ‐ [ exhales sharply ] You, too. God, guys. 00:36:35.780 --> 00:36:38.780 Oh, um, this is my roommate Abby. 00:36:38.780 --> 00:36:40.740 And this is Kelly and Ashley. 00:36:40.740 --> 00:36:42.320 KELLY: Oh, lovely to meet you. ‐ Yes. 00:36:42.320 --> 00:36:44.280 Nice to meet you, too. CONNOR: Hey, you guys. 00:36:44.280 --> 00:36:45.870 Wow. 00:36:45.870 --> 00:36:48.120 God, sorry, just seeing the three of you standing next to each other 00:36:48.120 --> 00:36:49.660 takes me right back to high school. 00:36:49.660 --> 00:36:51.960 Minus the bad cafeteria food. 00:36:51.960 --> 00:36:54.630 ‐ [ laughing loudly ] 00:36:55.800 --> 00:36:57.670 You're so funny. 00:36:57.670 --> 00:36:59.510 ‐ Uh, Harper, can I talk to you for a second? 00:36:59.510 --> 00:37:01.510 HARPER: Um, yeah. 00:37:01.510 --> 00:37:03.760 I'll just be a sec. 00:37:03.760 --> 00:37:06.140 ‐ Am I crazy, or did you have absolutely no idea 00:37:06.140 --> 00:37:07.640 I was coming to dinner last night? 00:37:07.640 --> 00:37:09.560 ‐ It was a surprise. ‐ Yeah. 00:37:09.560 --> 00:37:11.190 Yeah, I thought so. 00:37:11.190 --> 00:37:13.940 Um, sorry about that. ‐ It's not you. 00:37:13.940 --> 00:37:16.320 ‐ But, actually, I'd love to do... that again. 00:37:16.320 --> 00:37:19.110 Like, hang out again, if you got time. 00:37:19.110 --> 00:37:22.530 ‐ That sounds so nice, and, um... 00:37:22.530 --> 00:37:26.030 and I just don't know, uh, 'cause it's so busy and‐‐ 00:37:26.030 --> 00:37:27.080 ‐ Yeah. Totally got it. HARPER: Mm‐hmm. 00:37:27.080 --> 00:37:28.120 ‐ No pressure. HARPER: Yeah. 00:37:28.120 --> 00:37:30.460 ‐ But that being said, if you, you know, 00:37:30.460 --> 00:37:32.960 and‐and your roommate want to get out and hang out, 00:37:32.960 --> 00:37:34.380 that'd be great. ‐ Abby. Yeah. 00:37:34.380 --> 00:37:36.040 CONNOR: Abby. Yeah. Absolutely. 00:37:36.040 --> 00:37:38.800 ‐ Hey, if she doesn't sleep with him, then I will. 00:37:38.800 --> 00:37:41.840 [ giggling ] 00:37:41.840 --> 00:37:44.260 I'm just kidding. I would never. 00:37:44.260 --> 00:37:46.640 ‐ He's definitely still into her. 00:37:46.640 --> 00:37:48.260 ‐ I know. 00:37:48.260 --> 00:37:50.270 [ cell phone vibrating ] 00:37:51.390 --> 00:37:53.520 ‐ [ sighs ] I should... 00:37:53.520 --> 00:37:55.480 take this. 00:37:55.480 --> 00:37:56.650 Hello? 00:37:56.650 --> 00:37:58.070 JOHN: Did you know that you're standing 00:37:58.070 --> 00:37:59.900 in a country club that didn't let women have 00:37:59.900 --> 00:38:02.240 their own memberships until the early 2000s? 00:38:02.240 --> 00:38:03.910 ‐ How do you know that? 00:38:03.910 --> 00:38:05.870 ‐ Um, I might be tracking you, 00:38:05.870 --> 00:38:07.870 but it's for your own safety, clearly. 00:38:07.870 --> 00:38:08.870 ‐ What‐what do you want? 00:38:08.870 --> 00:38:11.620 ‐ I want you to break out of that closet. [ camera clicks ] 00:38:11.620 --> 00:38:13.080 ‐ I am not in the closet. 00:38:13.080 --> 00:38:14.670 I told you, Harper's gonna tell her parents everything 00:38:14.670 --> 00:38:15.670 right after the holidays. 00:38:15.670 --> 00:38:17.590 ‐ You deserve to be with someone 00:38:17.590 --> 00:38:21.090 who shouts their love for you from the rooftops. 00:38:21.090 --> 00:38:22.510 ‐ That's very sweet. [ toilet flushes over phone ] 00:38:22.510 --> 00:38:24.220 ‐ So stop being a doormat, you fool. 00:38:24.220 --> 00:38:26.470 ‐ Did you need something, or did you just call to shame me? 00:38:26.470 --> 00:38:27.760 ‐ I'm not shaming you. 00:38:27.760 --> 00:38:29.060 I just think the choice you're making is dumb 00:38:29.060 --> 00:38:30.640 and you should feel bad about it and yourself. 00:38:30.640 --> 00:38:33.640 Also, I am loving these fish. 00:38:34.690 --> 00:38:38.020 If I wanted to buy the exact same one for myself, 00:38:38.020 --> 00:38:40.780 where‐where do you think I would do that? 00:38:40.780 --> 00:38:41.990 ‐ What? 00:38:41.990 --> 00:38:43.820 JOHN: You know what, I think I should google it. 00:38:43.820 --> 00:38:45.110 I'm gonna google it. Thanks. 00:38:51.950 --> 00:38:53.620 ‐ Hey. 00:38:53.620 --> 00:38:55.750 ‐ Oh, hey. Hey. 00:39:00.460 --> 00:39:02.510 ‐ How's it going? ‐ Great. 00:39:02.510 --> 00:39:08.010 ‐ I was just taking a break from diagnosing everyone's mystery illnesses. 00:39:08.010 --> 00:39:09.760 ‐ [ Abby chuckles ] 00:39:09.760 --> 00:39:12.310 ‐ Hey, I wasn't trying to eavesdrop or anything. 00:39:12.310 --> 00:39:14.430 I was out there before you came out. 00:39:14.430 --> 00:39:17.100 You didn't see me, but, um... 00:39:18.560 --> 00:39:20.860 I can relate. 00:39:20.860 --> 00:39:22.860 ‐ Like, to what? 00:39:27.030 --> 00:39:28.280 ‐ Nothing. 00:39:28.280 --> 00:39:29.370 [ clears throat ] 00:39:29.370 --> 00:39:31.080 Nothing. [ inhales deeply ] 00:39:31.080 --> 00:39:33.200 [ sighs ] Okay. I'm gonna go back inside. 00:39:34.580 --> 00:39:39.000 I'm sure my mother's hairdresser wants to show me her weird finger again. 00:39:39.000 --> 00:39:41.000 ‐ [ chuckles ] ‐ So... 00:39:42.130 --> 00:39:43.880 I like your jacket. [ sighs ] 00:39:44.880 --> 00:39:47.180 Okay. [ shivers ] 00:39:49.300 --> 00:39:52.560 [ applause, cheering ] ‐ Thank you. Thank you so much. 00:39:52.560 --> 00:39:55.890 Will you all please join me in welcoming 00:39:55.890 --> 00:40:00.520 my dear, dear friend, Councilman Ted Caldwell. 00:40:00.520 --> 00:40:02.320 ‐ [ cheering ] 00:40:04.070 --> 00:40:06.110 TED: Thank you so much. Thank you. 00:40:06.110 --> 00:40:08.030 Isn't this the best time of year? 00:40:08.030 --> 00:40:09.490 I mean, really. 00:40:09.490 --> 00:40:11.450 I know we're all having a great time tonight, 00:40:11.450 --> 00:40:13.280 so I will be brief. 00:40:13.280 --> 00:40:15.660 I've accomplished a lot in my life, 00:40:15.660 --> 00:40:18.080 and serving you on the city council 00:40:18.080 --> 00:40:22.840 is right up there with my most rewarding life experiences. 00:40:22.840 --> 00:40:25.130 But I'm ready for more. 00:40:25.130 --> 00:40:26.340 ‐ [ cheering ] 00:40:26.340 --> 00:40:29.300 TED: These are turbulent times, 00:40:29.300 --> 00:40:33.350 and the way I can ensure depravity doesn't seep in 00:40:33.350 --> 00:40:35.930 through the cracks of our community 00:40:35.930 --> 00:40:40.020 is by making sure there are no cracks. 00:40:40.020 --> 00:40:42.020 ‐ [ cheering ] ‐ No cracks! 00:40:44.270 --> 00:40:48.740 TED: Look, our foundation is built on family, tradition and faith, 00:40:48.740 --> 00:40:54.200 and that is the only way we will keep safe and strong. 00:40:54.200 --> 00:40:56.290 I have loved being your city councilman, 00:40:56.290 --> 00:40:58.450 and I can't wait to be your mayor. 00:40:58.450 --> 00:40:59.750 Merry Christmas. 00:40:59.750 --> 00:41:01.540 ‐ [ cheering ] 00:41:01.540 --> 00:41:03.540 [ camera clicking rapidly ] 00:41:05.710 --> 00:41:07.710 ♪ holiday music ♪ 00:41:14.140 --> 00:41:15.390 [ cell phone chimes ] 00:41:25.060 --> 00:41:27.280 [ camera clicks ] 00:41:27.280 --> 00:41:28.940 [ phone chimes ] 00:41:32.820 --> 00:41:34.450 [ phone chimes ] 00:41:40.910 --> 00:41:43.000 ‐ [ chuckles softly ] 00:41:44.040 --> 00:41:47.050 TED: [ on video ] ...the way I can ensure depravity 00:41:47.050 --> 00:41:50.300 doesn't seep in through the cracks of our community 00:41:50.300 --> 00:41:53.470 is by making sure there are no cracks. 00:41:53.470 --> 00:41:56.390 ‐ [ cheering on video ] 00:41:56.390 --> 00:41:57.970 [ distant door closes ] 00:41:57.970 --> 00:41:59.770 TED: [on video] Look, our foundation is built 00:41:59.770 --> 00:42:03.190 on family, tradition and faith, 00:42:03.190 --> 00:42:08.270 and that is the only way we will keep safe and strong. 00:42:11.780 --> 00:42:13.780 [ TV playing indistinctly ] 00:42:15.950 --> 00:42:17.740 MAN: [ on TV ] Um, for the chicken breast, 00:42:17.740 --> 00:42:22.000 we were looking at a quarter cup of honey, and remember to use local honey... 00:42:22.000 --> 00:42:24.370 [ footsteps ] [ TV continues indistinctly ] 00:42:33.840 --> 00:42:35.130 ‐ [ sighs ] 00:42:35.130 --> 00:42:36.680 [ footsteps passing ] 00:42:39.260 --> 00:42:40.810 [ phone chimes ] 00:42:44.060 --> 00:42:45.270 ‐ [ gasps ] 00:42:47.150 --> 00:42:49.110 ‐ Whoa. [ whirring ] 00:42:49.110 --> 00:42:50.230 Shit. Shit! 00:42:51.070 --> 00:42:52.570 Come on. Come on. 00:42:52.570 --> 00:42:54.650 Nope. Shut up, shut up. Oh, no. 00:42:56.780 --> 00:42:59.030 [ clattering ] 00:42:59.030 --> 00:43:00.540 Oh! ‐ [ screams ] 00:43:00.540 --> 00:43:04.210 Abby, what are you doing in the closet? 00:43:04.210 --> 00:43:07.500 ‐ I‐‐ Well, I guess I must have been sleepwalking. 00:43:07.500 --> 00:43:09.500 ‐ Oh, that is very dangerous. 00:43:09.500 --> 00:43:11.500 I once took too many Ambien, 00:43:11.500 --> 00:43:13.630 and I bought a racehorse online. 00:43:13.630 --> 00:43:15.010 ABBY: Oh. TIPPER: Okay. 00:43:15.010 --> 00:43:16.590 You need to go back downstairs, Abby. 00:43:16.590 --> 00:43:18.090 ‐ Okay. ‐ Carefully. 00:43:18.090 --> 00:43:19.550 ABBY: Yeah, uh‐‐ ‐ Are you all right to do that? 00:43:19.550 --> 00:43:21.260 ABBY: Yeah. Oh, gosh, my phone, too. 00:43:21.260 --> 00:43:23.810 God, I‐I was in such a daze. TIPPER: I'll get all this. 00:43:23.810 --> 00:43:24.850 ABBY: Okay. ‐ Go on. 00:43:24.850 --> 00:43:25.850 ABBY: Um, I‐I was‐‐ 00:43:25.850 --> 00:43:27.400 ‐ Do you want me to come with you? 00:43:27.400 --> 00:43:28.480 ABBY: No, thank you. 00:43:28.480 --> 00:43:29.610 I'm sorry about this. 00:43:31.230 --> 00:43:32.610 [ gasps ] ‐ [ Harper growls playfully ] 00:43:32.610 --> 00:43:35.110 ‐ Oh, my God. [ laughs ] 00:43:35.110 --> 00:43:37.410 How did you get down here? 00:43:37.410 --> 00:43:39.370 ‐ When I saw that mess upstairs, 00:43:39.370 --> 00:43:41.870 I knew my mom would be busy for the next two hours. 00:43:41.870 --> 00:43:43.540 ‐ What do you want to do for two hours? 00:43:43.540 --> 00:43:45.500 ‐ I don't know. ‐ Hmm. 00:43:53.550 --> 00:43:55.550 [ birds chirping ] 00:44:05.480 --> 00:44:07.100 HARPER: Mm. 00:44:08.600 --> 00:44:10.310 [ footsteps in hall ] 00:44:10.310 --> 00:44:12.320 [ knocking ] ‐ [ both gasp ] 00:44:12.320 --> 00:44:14.280 TIPPER: Abby? ‐ Shit. 00:44:14.280 --> 00:44:15.690 Fuck. 00:44:15.690 --> 00:44:17.150 TIPPER: Abby, honey, are you okay? 00:44:17.150 --> 00:44:19.110 ‐ Uh‐huh. I'm‐I'm‐I'm okay. 00:44:19.110 --> 00:44:21.030 ‐ [ whispers ] I can't believe I fell asleep. 00:44:21.030 --> 00:44:23.790 TIPPER: Um, I think there's something against the door. 00:44:23.790 --> 00:44:25.790 ABBY: Um, I'm just moving it right now. 00:44:25.790 --> 00:44:27.000 Sorry. It's heavy. 00:44:28.080 --> 00:44:29.120 Morning. 00:44:29.120 --> 00:44:31.080 ‐ Why did you block the door? 00:44:31.080 --> 00:44:33.590 ‐ I‐I didn't want to sleepwalk again. 00:44:35.090 --> 00:44:37.260 ‐ Well, sorry to barge in. 00:44:37.260 --> 00:44:39.380 The twins usually stay down here. 00:44:39.380 --> 00:44:41.300 I'm just getting them Jane's old Game Boy. 00:44:41.300 --> 00:44:42.430 ‐ Morning, kids. 00:44:42.430 --> 00:44:44.600 ‐ Morning. TED: Abby. 00:44:44.600 --> 00:44:46.890 Uh, honey, I'm headed to the office, but I wanted to let you know 00:44:46.890 --> 00:44:50.520 I have invited Harry Levin and her husband to our Christmas Eve party. 00:44:51.560 --> 00:44:52.610 ‐ What? 00:44:52.610 --> 00:44:53.690 TED: Well, you heard what she said. 00:44:53.690 --> 00:44:56.610 ‐ [ Tipper sighs ] TED: It's not just about me. 00:44:56.610 --> 00:44:58.440 It's about our whole family. 00:44:58.440 --> 00:45:01.030 And what is a better representation of our family 00:45:01.030 --> 00:45:04.330 than your Christmas Eve party? 00:45:05.370 --> 00:45:07.200 ‐ It is legendary. 00:45:08.700 --> 00:45:09.960 TED: Mwah! ‐ [ Tipper sighs ] 00:45:09.960 --> 00:45:11.870 TED: Have a good day. ‐ You know I will. 00:45:11.870 --> 00:45:13.130 TIPPER: Can't even believe that. 00:45:13.130 --> 00:45:15.290 That is two more people on the guest list. 00:45:15.290 --> 00:45:18.050 I basically have to reimagine the entire party. 00:45:18.050 --> 00:45:19.720 ‐ [ sighs ] Man. 00:45:19.720 --> 00:45:21.340 ‐ Found it. 00:45:21.340 --> 00:45:23.930 Okay, come on, you two. 00:45:23.930 --> 00:45:25.850 Let's look at it. 00:45:28.180 --> 00:45:29.930 ‐ [ whispers ] That was very, very close. 00:45:29.930 --> 00:45:31.440 ‐ We shouldn't have done that. 00:45:31.440 --> 00:45:34.560 ‐ Harper, we've been up since 5:45 a.m.... ‐ This is the last batch. 00:45:34.560 --> 00:45:36.900 ‐ ...and the twins already made their own batch of cookies 00:45:36.900 --> 00:45:38.070 and decorated them. ‐ No. 00:45:38.070 --> 00:45:40.900 SLOANE: We're making these for the party. 00:45:40.900 --> 00:45:42.160 ‐ Okay, I'm off. 00:45:42.160 --> 00:45:43.570 ‐ What? Where are you going? 00:45:43.570 --> 00:45:45.490 ‐ Uh, Levi has a connection with a local potpourri vendor. 00:45:45.490 --> 00:45:46.700 He's gonna introduce us. 00:45:46.700 --> 00:45:48.370 ‐ Great. Right. ERIC: Yeah. 00:45:48.370 --> 00:45:49.370 Bye, babe. 00:45:49.370 --> 00:45:50.540 TIPPER: It just runs everywhere. 00:45:50.540 --> 00:45:51.620 ‐ Bye, kids. ‐ That's right. That's right. 00:45:51.620 --> 00:45:52.790 KIDS: Bye, Daddy. 00:45:52.790 --> 00:45:54.000 ‐ Jane. Oh, my God. 00:45:54.000 --> 00:45:55.500 ‐ I'm just gonna do a button. Can I‐‐ ‐ No, no. 00:45:55.500 --> 00:45:57.000 ‐ You can't decorate these. ‐ But they have buttons. 00:45:57.000 --> 00:45:58.710 ‐ And can you not? I'm trying to have an even number. 00:45:58.710 --> 00:46:00.340 ‐ Mommy, when are we gonna see Santa? 00:46:00.340 --> 00:46:01.800 ‐ Honey, I don't know if we're gonna have time 00:46:01.800 --> 00:46:03.680 to see him this year. Jane, can you not? I just‐‐ 00:46:03.680 --> 00:46:05.510 ‐ Oh, take them to see Santa Claus. 00:46:05.510 --> 00:46:07.810 This could be the last year that they see him. 00:46:07.810 --> 00:46:09.100 ‐ Why? Is Santa dying? 00:46:09.100 --> 00:46:10.810 ‐ No. ‐ Are we dying? 00:46:10.810 --> 00:46:13.100 ‐ No. Fine, I will take you. 00:46:13.100 --> 00:46:15.270 I still need to get a white elephant gift anyway. 00:46:15.270 --> 00:46:17.610 Did you guys get yours? ‐ Yes. 00:46:17.610 --> 00:46:20.230 ‐ [ chuckles ] Yeah, I'm making something very special. 00:46:20.230 --> 00:46:21.610 ‐ Uh, what is white elephant? 00:46:21.610 --> 00:46:23.530 TIPPER: Oh, it's a gift exchange game we do 00:46:23.530 --> 00:46:25.950 every year at our Christmas Eve party. ‐ Oh. 00:46:25.950 --> 00:46:27.910 ‐ And I guess you don't know what it is 00:46:27.910 --> 00:46:30.450 because Harper forgot to tell you about it. 00:46:30.450 --> 00:46:32.370 ‐ I'm sorry. ‐ That's okay. 00:46:32.370 --> 00:46:33.790 I‐I can run out and grab one today. 00:46:33.790 --> 00:46:37.630 ‐ Great. So, you girls can tag along with Sloane to the mall. 00:46:37.630 --> 00:46:40.170 ‐ Oh. Actually, I told Dad that I'd go to his office 00:46:40.170 --> 00:46:42.420 and help him write his speech for Carolyn's dinner tonight. 00:46:42.420 --> 00:46:44.340 ‐ Yeah, I wish I could go, 00:46:44.340 --> 00:46:46.140 but, um, I have to put the finishing touches 00:46:46.140 --> 00:46:48.350 on my Christmas gifts. 00:46:48.350 --> 00:46:50.220 ‐ Guess it's just gonna be you and me. Fun. 00:46:50.220 --> 00:46:52.180 TIPPER: Well, just make sure you're all back here by 4:00. 00:46:52.180 --> 00:46:53.560 ‐ That's okay? 00:46:53.560 --> 00:46:56.560 ‐ We are going to get that Christmas photo tonight 00:46:56.560 --> 00:46:57.860 before we leave for dinner. 00:46:57.860 --> 00:46:59.020 ‐ Yes. ‐ Yes. 00:46:59.020 --> 00:47:01.030 ♪ holiday music playing over speakers ♪ 00:47:09.620 --> 00:47:11.290 ‐ Oh. Hey. 00:47:11.290 --> 00:47:14.000 Hey. Can you watch them for a bit? 00:47:14.000 --> 00:47:16.120 I have to run an errand. Um, Santa promised them 00:47:16.120 --> 00:47:19.340 [ hushed ] the complete works of Sylvia Plath, so... 00:47:19.340 --> 00:47:20.630 Is that all right? 00:47:20.630 --> 00:47:21.750 ‐ Yeah. 00:47:21.750 --> 00:47:23.260 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 00:47:23.260 --> 00:47:25.010 ‐ Okay. Thank you. 00:47:25.010 --> 00:47:27.090 Be good, you two. 00:47:27.090 --> 00:47:30.050 ♪ playful holiday music ♪ 00:47:30.050 --> 00:47:34.140 ‐ Hi, guys. Do you, um, want to come over‐‐ 00:47:34.140 --> 00:47:35.560 Want to‐‐ Come on. 00:47:35.560 --> 00:47:37.940 ♪ ♪ 00:47:37.940 --> 00:47:39.480 [ chuckles nervously ] 00:47:41.860 --> 00:47:44.690 ‐ Why was Aunt Harper hiding in your room this morning? 00:47:45.740 --> 00:47:48.280 ‐ Uh, we were playing a game. 00:47:48.280 --> 00:47:49.950 ‐ Like hide‐and‐seek? 00:47:49.950 --> 00:47:51.580 ‐ Yeah, like hide‐and‐seek. 00:47:51.580 --> 00:47:53.160 MAGNUS: We love that game. 00:47:53.160 --> 00:47:55.160 ‐ What do you guys think about this white elephant game? 00:47:55.160 --> 00:47:57.000 What gift should I get? Can you help me? 00:47:57.000 --> 00:47:58.750 ‐ How about this? 00:47:58.750 --> 00:48:00.380 ‐ That is nice. 00:48:00.380 --> 00:48:03.710 I was thinking maybe something everyone might like. 00:48:03.710 --> 00:48:05.590 Like, um... 00:48:05.590 --> 00:48:08.260 I don't know, a scarf might be good, actually. 00:48:08.260 --> 00:48:10.680 Someone might want to have that. 00:48:10.680 --> 00:48:13.100 Seems Christmassy. 00:48:14.720 --> 00:48:16.560 Oh. 00:48:16.560 --> 00:48:18.390 Hey, come on. Um... 00:48:18.390 --> 00:48:20.350 Hey, Carolyn. 00:48:20.350 --> 00:48:21.860 Hey, it's good to see you. 00:48:23.190 --> 00:48:25.190 I'm Abby. We met last night. 00:48:25.190 --> 00:48:27.190 I'm Harper Caldwell's friend. 00:48:27.190 --> 00:48:29.700 ‐ [ gasps ] Oh! Oh, yes. 00:48:29.700 --> 00:48:31.950 [ chuckling ] Yes, of course. 00:48:31.950 --> 00:48:33.240 Mm. 00:48:34.740 --> 00:48:37.290 It's lovely seeing you. 00:48:38.330 --> 00:48:40.330 ‐ Hey, I'm‐I'm really looking forward to dinner tonight. 00:48:41.380 --> 00:48:43.420 ‐ Okay. ‐ Okay. 00:48:46.420 --> 00:48:48.300 Have‐have a nice day. I'll see you later. 00:48:48.300 --> 00:48:50.340 [ alarm blaring ] CRYSTAL: Hey! Ma'am! 00:48:50.340 --> 00:48:51.760 ED: Oh, ma'am! CRYSTAL: Ma'am, we're gonna stop you right there. 00:48:51.760 --> 00:48:53.800 ED: Ma'am, put the bag on the floor. ‐ Okay. 00:48:53.800 --> 00:48:54.970 CRYSTAL: Miss, put it down. ED: Ma'am! 00:48:54.970 --> 00:48:57.560 Put the bag on the floor and slide it to me. 00:48:57.560 --> 00:48:58.890 You want to explain that? ABBY: A‐As I've said, 00:48:58.890 --> 00:49:01.350 I did not put that in my bag. There might‐‐ 00:49:01.350 --> 00:49:03.360 ‐ Oh, you didn't put it in your bag... ‐ Oh. 00:49:03.360 --> 00:49:06.480 ‐ ...but it ended up in your bag, so this is probably just a big misunderstanding. 00:49:06.480 --> 00:49:08.990 ‐ Maybe it grew legs and then it walked into her bag. 00:49:08.990 --> 00:49:10.530 ‐ CRYSTAL: [ stammers ] Did you check it for legs, or‐‐ 00:49:10.530 --> 00:49:11.860 ‐ I haven't checked it for legs. ‐ You haven't done that. 00:49:11.860 --> 00:49:13.780 ‐ I'm not suggesting that it grew legs. 00:49:13.780 --> 00:49:15.740 ‐ It's not looking good, sweetie. 00:49:15.740 --> 00:49:16.950 ‐ Pittsburgh, huh? 00:49:16.950 --> 00:49:18.250 ‐ Yeah. 00:49:18.250 --> 00:49:19.960 ‐ What are you doing down this way? 00:49:19.960 --> 00:49:21.330 ‐ You pulling a job? 00:49:21.330 --> 00:49:22.670 Jacking a roost? 00:49:22.670 --> 00:49:24.290 ‐ What was that? CRYSTAL: Yeah, hocking crank 00:49:24.290 --> 00:49:25.630 and breaking bad? 00:49:25.630 --> 00:49:27.670 ‐ I'm not doing any of those things. ED: Smash and grab? 00:49:27.670 --> 00:49:29.720 ‐ I‐I didn't take this necklace. CRYSTAL: Wow. 00:49:29.720 --> 00:49:31.680 ABBY: I'm sure that you could review some footage. 00:49:31.680 --> 00:49:32.680 Aren't there cameras in malls? 00:49:32.680 --> 00:49:34.680 ‐ Are you telling me how to do my job? ABBY: There are cameras everywhere. 00:49:34.680 --> 00:49:35.890 CRYSTAL: You're gonna regret it. ‐ No. 00:49:35.890 --> 00:49:37.010 ED: You know what? Fine. ‐ No, I'm not doing any‐‐ 00:49:37.010 --> 00:49:38.970 ‐ Why don't you go ahead and do my job, hotshot? ‐ Good freaking luck. 00:49:38.970 --> 00:49:40.390 ED: You're in charge now. CRYSTAL: Yeah. 00:49:40.390 --> 00:49:41.890 ‐ Can you believe‐‐ ‐ No, I'm gonna get her to sing, okay? 00:49:41.890 --> 00:49:43.650 ED: Go ahead. CRYSTAL: I'm gonna make this little birdie 00:49:43.650 --> 00:49:45.900 go tweet, tweet, tweet, becau‐‐ ‐ Go ahead. 00:49:47.400 --> 00:49:49.030 ‐ Eugene. ‐ [ Eugene stammers ] 00:49:49.030 --> 00:49:50.440 ‐ Goddamn it. We're‐‐ ‐ What are you‐‐ 00:49:50.440 --> 00:49:51.860 ‐ I heard there were Cruffins in here. 00:49:51.860 --> 00:49:52.950 ‐ No. 00:49:52.950 --> 00:49:54.410 ‐ There aren't any Cruffins. 00:49:54.410 --> 00:49:56.410 EUGENE: There's not, or there were? Were there? 00:49:56.410 --> 00:49:58.410 CRYSTAL: No, we stopped keeping food in here. ED: No. 00:49:58.410 --> 00:49:59.750 HARPER: Dad, Abby would never do this. 00:49:59.750 --> 00:50:00.960 SLOANE: Go get ready quick, quick, quick, 00:50:00.960 --> 00:50:02.120 because we're late now. 00:50:02.120 --> 00:50:03.290 TED: This isn't a conversation, Harper. 00:50:03.290 --> 00:50:04.290 HARPER: Please, Dad, just be‐‐ 00:50:04.290 --> 00:50:05.790 TIPPER: [ hushed ] Shh! Quiet. 00:50:05.790 --> 00:50:07.420 HARPER: Okay. I'm sorry. TIPPER: Oh, I know. I know. 00:50:07.420 --> 00:50:09.170 HARPER: I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 00:50:14.510 --> 00:50:16.550 ‐ I didn't do it. 00:50:16.550 --> 00:50:17.890 ‐ Baby, I know. 00:50:17.890 --> 00:50:21.680 But Carolyn thinks it would just be better if you weren't at the dinner. 00:50:21.680 --> 00:50:23.770 Look, it's gonna be so boring anyways. 00:50:23.770 --> 00:50:25.400 You're lucky you don't have to go. 00:50:25.400 --> 00:50:27.400 Come here. 00:50:29.190 --> 00:50:31.440 [ sighs ] 00:50:31.440 --> 00:50:35.110 Can we hang out tonight after the dinner? 00:50:35.110 --> 00:50:37.580 My friends want to go out, and‐and we can go with them 00:50:37.580 --> 00:50:39.990 or we can not go with them, but... 00:50:39.990 --> 00:50:42.620 I just think we‐we need a break 00:50:42.620 --> 00:50:44.710 from the family. 00:50:44.710 --> 00:50:46.130 ‐ Yeah, s‐‐ [ knocking ] 00:50:47.710 --> 00:50:49.840 ‐ Harper, we have got to go. 00:50:49.840 --> 00:50:51.340 Come on, we're gonna be late. 00:50:51.340 --> 00:50:53.050 ‐ Okay. [ sighs ] 00:50:53.050 --> 00:50:54.470 I'll see you later? ABBY: Mm‐hmm. 00:50:54.470 --> 00:50:55.590 ‐ Okay. 00:50:55.590 --> 00:50:56.930 I'm sorry. 00:50:56.930 --> 00:50:59.350 TIPPER: We weren't able to get the photo again. 00:50:59.350 --> 00:51:00.600 [ door closes ] 00:51:00.600 --> 00:51:02.600 [ "Blame It on Christmas" by Shea Diamond playing ] 00:51:02.600 --> 00:51:04.600 ♪ Blame it on Christmas ♪ 00:51:06.020 --> 00:51:09.190 ♪ Why I'm out of control ♪ 00:51:10.440 --> 00:51:14.360 ♪ Oh, give me forgiveness ♪ 00:51:14.360 --> 00:51:17.870 ♪ For what's about to unfold ♪ 00:51:19.660 --> 00:51:24.160 ♪ 'Cause I just can't keep my cool ♪ 00:51:24.160 --> 00:51:28.500 ♪ While I'm tiding all of this yule ♪ 00:51:28.500 --> 00:51:32.250 ♪ Blame it on, blame it on Christmas ♪ 00:51:32.250 --> 00:51:34.840 ♪ Ooh, why I'm acting a fool. ♪ 00:51:36.630 --> 00:51:37.800 ‐ Hey. 00:51:37.800 --> 00:51:39.850 ‐ We meet again. 00:51:39.850 --> 00:51:41.430 ABBY: [ chuckles ] Yeah. 00:51:41.430 --> 00:51:43.060 ‐ No Harper? 00:51:43.060 --> 00:51:45.890 ‐ No, she's, um, with her family. 00:51:45.890 --> 00:51:47.850 I‐I'm gonna meet up with her in a bit. 00:51:47.850 --> 00:51:49.310 What'd you get? 00:51:49.310 --> 00:51:51.980 ‐ Um... 00:51:51.980 --> 00:51:56.030 Oh, I can't tell you, because it's for the white elephant party. 00:51:56.030 --> 00:51:57.990 ‐ Ah, you're going to that, too? 00:51:57.990 --> 00:51:59.370 ‐ Oh, yeah. 00:51:59.370 --> 00:52:01.200 Yeah, my family goes every year. 00:52:01.200 --> 00:52:03.120 It's, um... 00:52:03.120 --> 00:52:05.200 God, it's the best party of the year. 00:52:05.200 --> 00:52:07.460 ‐ [ laughs ] 00:52:07.460 --> 00:52:10.040 You know, I'm‐I'm glad I ran into you, 00:52:10.040 --> 00:52:13.210 'cause I'm having this thing where if I stick my finger in my eye, 00:52:13.210 --> 00:52:14.960 it, like, really hurts. 00:52:14.960 --> 00:52:18.590 ‐ Yeah, I mean, that's a classic case of, um, 00:52:18.590 --> 00:52:20.850 contact stupiditis. 00:52:20.850 --> 00:52:23.100 Um, because it's a stupid thing to do. 00:52:23.100 --> 00:52:24.890 ‐ [ laughs ] Yep. ‐ Once you get to 00:52:24.890 --> 00:52:26.770 the finger‐poking stage, you're‐you're pretty much dead. 00:52:26.770 --> 00:52:28.190 ‐ [ sighs ] 00:52:28.190 --> 00:52:31.520 I'd really like to drink some alcohol. 00:52:31.520 --> 00:52:33.230 Do you know where I could do that? 00:52:34.900 --> 00:52:36.570 ‐ Yes. 00:52:38.240 --> 00:52:40.490 ‐ ♪ What is Christmas? ♪ 00:52:40.490 --> 00:52:43.120 ‐ ♪ Christmas is for caring ♪ ‐ [ scattered laughter ] 00:52:43.120 --> 00:52:45.040 ‐ ♪ What is Christmas? ♪ 00:52:45.040 --> 00:52:47.790 ‐ ♪ Christmas is for sharing ♪ 00:52:47.790 --> 00:52:49.420 ‐ ♪ What is Christmas? ♪ 00:52:49.420 --> 00:52:52.250 ♪ Can't you guess? ♪ 00:52:52.250 --> 00:52:55.380 ‐ ♪ Christmas is for ha... ♪ 00:52:55.380 --> 00:52:56.840 ♪ Penis ♪ 00:52:56.840 --> 00:52:58.590 RILEY: Yes, you are. ‐ I wish. 00:52:58.590 --> 00:53:00.430 ‐ Just tell me. ‐ I wish I had a story, like‐‐ 00:53:00.430 --> 00:53:02.050 ‐ Did you steal it? ‐ No. 00:53:02.050 --> 00:53:05.720 And I still don't have a white elephant gift, on top of it all. 00:53:05.720 --> 00:53:07.810 ‐ You've got to get one. ‐ I'm trying. 00:53:07.810 --> 00:53:09.390 ‐ I will help you with this. 00:53:09.390 --> 00:53:11.770 I know a lot of places that aren't malls. 00:53:11.770 --> 00:53:13.060 ‐ That would be great. 00:53:13.060 --> 00:53:15.440 SINGERS: ♪ And when does Christmas come? ♪ 00:53:15.440 --> 00:53:19.110 ♪ And when does Christmas leave? ♪ 00:53:19.110 --> 00:53:23.700 ‐ [ laughter ] SINGERS: ♪ It comes but never goes... ♪ 00:53:23.700 --> 00:53:26.910 ‐ What did you mean last night when you said you could relate? 00:53:26.910 --> 00:53:30.120 ‐ That was just a comment based on an assumption 00:53:30.120 --> 00:53:33.040 that I was making about you and Harper. 00:53:35.960 --> 00:53:38.710 ‐ I think it's probably an accurate assumption. 00:53:40.970 --> 00:53:43.140 You don't have to talk to me about this stuff. 00:53:43.140 --> 00:53:44.510 I know it's weird, like‐‐ 00:53:44.510 --> 00:53:46.390 ‐ So, what has she told you? 00:53:46.390 --> 00:53:48.600 ‐ That you dated in high school. 00:53:48.600 --> 00:53:50.850 That you were her first girlfriend. 00:53:50.850 --> 00:53:52.770 That's about it. 00:53:54.150 --> 00:53:55.900 Is there more? RILEY: Mm‐hmm. 00:53:56.940 --> 00:53:57.940 Yeah, a little. 00:54:00.900 --> 00:54:02.910 I mean... 00:54:05.620 --> 00:54:07.620 Yeah. 00:54:07.620 --> 00:54:10.120 Yeah, growing up, we were totally inseparable. 00:54:10.120 --> 00:54:11.830 We were best friends. 00:54:11.830 --> 00:54:15.000 And then, freshman year, we became more than friends. 00:54:16.250 --> 00:54:18.250 We started dating. 00:54:20.010 --> 00:54:23.430 But nobody knew that, obviously. 00:54:23.430 --> 00:54:26.470 And we would, like, leave these little love letters 00:54:26.470 --> 00:54:28.260 in‐in each other's lockers. 00:54:28.260 --> 00:54:31.390 And one day, one of Harper's friends found one of the letters, 00:54:31.390 --> 00:54:34.690 and she asked Harper wh‐what it was about, 00:54:34.690 --> 00:54:39.480 and Harper basically just said that I am gay 00:54:39.480 --> 00:54:41.320 and that I wouldn't leave her alone. 00:54:41.320 --> 00:54:44.280 And then within a couple days, like, everybody in school found out, 00:54:44.280 --> 00:54:47.320 and everybody was so awful to me. 00:54:48.370 --> 00:54:50.410 ‐ I'm sorry, that's‐‐ I'm sorry. 00:54:51.450 --> 00:54:54.540 ‐ Yeah, so the thing that I can relate to is just 00:54:54.540 --> 00:54:58.250 being in love with somebody that is... 00:54:58.250 --> 00:55:01.050 too afraid to show the world who they are. 00:55:07.970 --> 00:55:09.680 But that was a long time ago. 00:55:10.720 --> 00:55:12.270 ‐ Yeah. 00:55:12.270 --> 00:55:14.270 [ music ends ] [ cheering, applause ] 00:55:14.270 --> 00:55:16.270 ‐ Thank you! 00:55:16.270 --> 00:55:19.020 All right, that's enough. 00:55:20.070 --> 00:55:23.860 And with this next song, we're gonna need a little help from you. 00:55:23.860 --> 00:55:26.450 ‐ We're gonna ask you a... 00:55:26.450 --> 00:55:28.070 ‐ Question. ‐ ...question. 00:55:28.070 --> 00:55:30.330 And you are going to... 00:55:30.330 --> 00:55:31.910 ‐ Give us the answer. ‐ ...answer. 00:55:31.910 --> 00:55:34.040 ‐ Yeah. ‐ [ laughs ] It's simple. 00:55:34.040 --> 00:55:35.620 EM K. ULTRA: Here we go. 00:55:35.620 --> 00:55:37.120 [ applause ] 00:55:37.120 --> 00:55:40.130 ♪ Who's got a beard that's long and white? ♪ 00:55:40.130 --> 00:55:42.590 ‐ [ patrons singing ] ‐ We're gonna sing. Ready? ‐ Mm‐hmm. Yeah. 00:55:42.590 --> 00:55:45.220 ‐ ♪ Who comes around on a special night? ♪ 00:55:45.220 --> 00:55:48.090 ‐ ♪ Santa comes around on a special night ♪ 00:55:48.090 --> 00:55:50.600 ‐ ♪ Special night ♪ ‐ ♪ Special night ♪ 00:55:50.600 --> 00:55:53.560 ‐ ♪ Beard that's white ♪ ‐ ♪ Beard that's white ♪ 00:55:53.560 --> 00:55:54.980 MISS L'TEAU: Everybody! ‐ Whoa. 00:55:54.980 --> 00:55:58.650 ALL: ♪ Must be Santa, must be Santa ♪ 00:55:58.650 --> 00:56:01.150 ♪ Must be Santa ♪ 00:56:01.150 --> 00:56:04.110 ♪ Santa Claus ♪ 00:56:04.110 --> 00:56:05.900 ‐ No. No, what? Oh, my God, no. ‐ What? 00:56:05.900 --> 00:56:07.860 ‐ Oh, we're gonna get a little more intimate now. 00:56:07.860 --> 00:56:09.200 RILEY: Yes! 00:56:09.200 --> 00:56:11.580 ‐ ♪ Who's got boots and a suit of red? ♪ 00:56:11.580 --> 00:56:13.370 ‐ [ laughs ] ‐ Oh... [ laughs ] 00:56:13.370 --> 00:56:16.000 Come on, you want to hear her sing, right? 00:56:16.000 --> 00:56:19.670 MISS L'TEAU: Yeah. Yeah, we want to hear her sing. ‐ [ cheering ] 00:56:19.670 --> 00:56:21.960 EM K. ULTRA: ♪ Who's got boots and a suit of red? ♪ ‐ I'll help you. 00:56:21.960 --> 00:56:24.670 ABBY and RILEY: ♪ Santa's got boots and a suit of red ♪ 00:56:24.670 --> 00:56:27.260 EM K. ULTRA: Yeah, perfect! MISS L'TEAU: ♪ Who's got a long cap on his head? ♪ 00:56:27.260 --> 00:56:30.010 ALL: ♪ Santa's got a long cap on his head ♪ 00:56:30.010 --> 00:56:32.760 EM K. ULTRA: ♪ On his head ♪ OTHERS: ♪ On his head ♪ 00:56:32.760 --> 00:56:35.680 SINGERS: ♪ Suit of red ♪ PATRONS: ♪ Suit of red ♪ 00:56:35.680 --> 00:56:41.230 ALL: ♪ Must be Santa, must be Santa ♪ 00:56:41.230 --> 00:56:43.610 ♪ Must be Santa ♪ 00:56:43.610 --> 00:56:47.110 ♪ Santa Claus ♪ 00:56:47.110 --> 00:56:49.320 ♪ Must be Santa ♪ 00:56:49.320 --> 00:56:52.070 ♪ Must be Santa ♪ [ cell phone chimes ] 00:56:52.070 --> 00:56:53.950 ♪ Must be Santa... ♪ 00:56:53.950 --> 00:56:56.790 ‐ Um, I should‐‐ I should close out. 00:56:56.790 --> 00:56:58.830 It's‐‐ Harper texted me. 00:56:58.830 --> 00:57:01.170 ‐ Oh. ‐ Yes. 00:57:01.170 --> 00:57:03.460 PATRONS: ♪ Santa's got a beard that's long... ♪ 00:57:03.460 --> 00:57:06.170 ♪ lively dance music ♪ 00:57:06.170 --> 00:57:07.550 ASHLEY: ...of the square. 00:57:07.550 --> 00:57:09.170 The guy at the top of the square. 00:57:09.170 --> 00:57:10.380 That's the business model. 00:57:10.380 --> 00:57:12.010 It's brilliant. 00:57:12.010 --> 00:57:14.050 ‐ Hi. 00:57:14.050 --> 00:57:15.560 ‐ Oh, Abby's here. CONNOR: Shots, shots, shots. 00:57:15.560 --> 00:57:17.600 You guys ready? ‐ How was‐‐ How was tonight? 00:57:17.600 --> 00:57:19.140 ‐ Shots! ‐ Oh, shots. ABBY: It was great. It was good. 00:57:19.140 --> 00:57:20.940 All right, I think I'm gonna grab a beer. ASHLEY: Shots, shots, shots, shots. 00:57:20.940 --> 00:57:22.480 ‐ No, no, no, no. CONNOR: No, Abby, Abby, hey. 00:57:22.480 --> 00:57:23.610 Cannot be at this place sober. 00:57:23.610 --> 00:57:24.820 It's a‐‐ Ready? Cheers. ASHLEY and KELLY: Cheers. 00:57:24.820 --> 00:57:26.150 ‐ Eyes, eyes. ‐ Eyes, eyes. 00:57:26.150 --> 00:57:28.400 ‐ Eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes. 00:57:28.400 --> 00:57:29.530 CONNOR: One, two, three. Go. 00:57:30.570 --> 00:57:32.530 [ music ends ] ‐ Oh! 00:57:32.530 --> 00:57:34.240 ‐ Okay, I need some music. HARPER: Did you have dinner? 00:57:34.240 --> 00:57:35.660 ASHLEY: Come, come, come, come, come. ABBY: Yeah. 00:57:35.660 --> 00:57:37.490 ‐ Wait. Okay, I'll come right back. 00:57:39.960 --> 00:57:41.290 ♪ lively dance music ♪ 00:57:41.290 --> 00:57:43.380 Are you having the most terrible time? 00:57:43.380 --> 00:57:44.460 ‐ No. 00:57:44.460 --> 00:57:46.300 No, I'm‐I'm just tired. 00:57:46.300 --> 00:57:47.550 ‐ Okay. ‐ I'm really tired. 00:57:47.550 --> 00:57:49.460 I think I'm gonna go. 00:57:49.460 --> 00:57:51.010 ‐ Oh, no. 00:57:51.010 --> 00:57:52.510 Uh... 00:57:52.510 --> 00:57:54.760 [ sighs ] I kind of want to stay a little bit longer. 00:57:54.760 --> 00:57:56.680 Is that okay? 00:57:59.140 --> 00:58:00.980 ‐ [ laughter ] 00:58:02.230 --> 00:58:04.100 ‐ Yeah, you should‐‐ Yes, of course. 00:58:04.100 --> 00:58:05.360 Yeah. Yeah, I'm just‐‐ ‐ Yeah? 00:58:05.360 --> 00:58:06.690 Are you sure? ‐ Mm. 00:58:06.690 --> 00:58:08.400 ‐ Okay. 00:58:08.400 --> 00:58:09.990 And you'll get home okay? 00:58:09.990 --> 00:58:11.570 I won't be out late. 00:58:11.570 --> 00:58:12.950 Okay. 00:58:12.950 --> 00:58:15.700 Text me when you get home. 00:58:15.700 --> 00:58:17.080 CONNOR: Hey. 00:58:17.080 --> 00:58:18.240 How about you? 00:58:18.240 --> 00:58:19.750 You won't. You won't. 00:58:19.750 --> 00:58:22.290 She will. You won't. You won't. KELLY: You won't. 00:58:47.980 --> 00:58:50.610 [ over speakers ] ♪ Hey ♪ 00:58:50.610 --> 00:58:52.860 ♪ What are we doing? ♪ 00:58:52.860 --> 00:58:55.110 ‐ [ quiet chatter ] 00:58:55.110 --> 00:58:56.870 ♪ Don't you remem... ♪ 00:58:56.870 --> 00:58:58.330 CONNOR: Well, that was fun. 00:58:58.330 --> 00:59:00.080 HARPER: Whew. Yeah. 00:59:00.080 --> 00:59:02.160 [ Connor groans ] [ Harper sighs ] 00:59:02.160 --> 00:59:04.580 ‐ I'm glad you came out. ‐ Yeah. 00:59:04.580 --> 00:59:06.830 ‐ It's been a minute, you know, since we've gotten to do this. 00:59:06.830 --> 00:59:09.540 Like, since we‐‐ 00:59:10.590 --> 00:59:11.880 Well, you know. 00:59:11.880 --> 00:59:13.970 I've missed you. 00:59:13.970 --> 00:59:15.720 ‐ No, it's nice to catch up. 00:59:15.720 --> 00:59:17.180 ‐ Yeah. 00:59:17.180 --> 00:59:19.810 [ takes deep breath ] 00:59:19.810 --> 00:59:22.100 ‐ Well, I'm that way. 00:59:22.100 --> 00:59:23.640 ‐ Oh, darn. ‐ Where are you? 00:59:23.640 --> 00:59:25.140 ‐ I'm that way. [ laughs ] 00:59:25.140 --> 00:59:26.650 ‐ Good night. ‐ Good night. 00:59:26.650 --> 00:59:28.230 It was great seeing you. ‐ [ grunts ] 00:59:28.230 --> 00:59:30.400 ‐ [ clears throat ] ‐ [ Harper chuckles ] 00:59:30.400 --> 00:59:32.230 ‐ [ sighs ] 00:59:32.230 --> 00:59:34.240 Hey, Harper, was there someone else? 00:59:36.610 --> 00:59:38.030 ‐ What do you mean? 00:59:39.070 --> 00:59:41.120 ‐ Is that why we broke up? 00:59:42.160 --> 00:59:44.250 ‐ No. 00:59:44.250 --> 00:59:46.960 No, I mean, I‐I told you that the long distance 00:59:46.960 --> 00:59:48.790 just got too hard and‐‐ 00:59:48.790 --> 00:59:50.290 ‐ The distance. Yeah, I know, I know. 00:59:50.290 --> 00:59:51.590 I know. 00:59:52.630 --> 00:59:54.260 [ sighs ] 00:59:54.260 --> 00:59:56.090 I don't know. Just... 00:59:56.090 --> 00:59:58.970 kind of always felt like there was something... 01:00:00.760 --> 01:00:04.020 Kind of felt like there was something you weren't telling me. 01:00:11.150 --> 01:00:13.150 ‐ There wasn't someone else. 01:00:33.840 --> 01:00:35.260 ABBY: [ whispers ] Hey. 01:00:37.300 --> 01:00:39.300 ‐ What's wrong? 01:00:39.300 --> 01:00:40.640 ‐ Just making sure you're okay. 01:00:40.640 --> 01:00:42.260 ‐ Why wouldn't I be? 01:00:42.260 --> 01:00:44.850 ‐ I don't know, you weren't answering me, so I was‐‐ 01:00:44.850 --> 01:00:47.890 ‐ I‐I know, but you‐you knew I was out with my friends. 01:00:47.890 --> 01:00:49.270 ‐ Yeah, but, I mean, I didn't know that 01:00:49.270 --> 01:00:50.980 you were gonna be out till 2:00 in the morning, 01:00:50.980 --> 01:00:52.190 so I'm just checking on you. 01:00:52.190 --> 01:00:54.480 ‐ Okay. 01:00:54.480 --> 01:00:56.780 [ chuckles ] I'm sorry. I didn't know I had a curfew. 01:00:56.780 --> 01:00:58.570 ‐ What is going on with you? 01:00:58.570 --> 01:01:00.570 ‐ Nothing. I‐‐ 01:01:00.570 --> 01:01:02.280 Nothing. 01:01:02.280 --> 01:01:06.120 I just don't know why you're keeping tabs on me. 01:01:06.120 --> 01:01:08.080 ‐ Keeping tabs on you? ‐ Yeah. 01:01:08.080 --> 01:01:09.710 It just‐‐ 01:01:09.710 --> 01:01:11.290 [ sighs ] 01:01:11.290 --> 01:01:12.880 ‐ What? 01:01:12.880 --> 01:01:16.460 ‐ It just feels a little... suffocating. 01:01:16.460 --> 01:01:17.840 ‐ I'm suffocating you? 01:01:17.840 --> 01:01:19.840 ‐ Or not, but just‐‐ 01:01:19.840 --> 01:01:21.800 ‐ Well, I feel really suffocated in the closet 01:01:21.800 --> 01:01:23.220 that you shoved me back into. ‐ Shh! 01:01:23.220 --> 01:01:24.680 [ hushed ] You agreed to this. 01:01:24.680 --> 01:01:25.930 ‐ Yeah, we were practically already here. 01:01:25.930 --> 01:01:27.180 ‐ Can you sh‐‐ 01:01:27.180 --> 01:01:28.600 Please be quiet. 01:01:28.600 --> 01:01:30.600 ‐ I was gonna‐‐ I‐‐ 01:01:32.400 --> 01:01:34.650 If I knew that part of what I was agreeing to 01:01:34.650 --> 01:01:36.690 was you hanging out with your ex‐boyfriend all night, 01:01:36.690 --> 01:01:39.690 maybe I wouldn't have. ‐ [ sighs ] God, Abby. 01:01:42.240 --> 01:01:45.330 I just‐‐ I feel like we just need some space. 01:01:45.330 --> 01:01:46.620 ‐ You need some space? 01:01:48.450 --> 01:01:50.250 Okay. 01:01:51.420 --> 01:01:52.830 ‐ Abby. 01:01:52.830 --> 01:01:54.290 [ footsteps stomping ] ‐ Oh. 01:01:54.290 --> 01:01:57.460 She is very heavy‐footed. 01:01:57.460 --> 01:02:02.470 Honey, I have a list of party errands that Jane has volunteered to run, 01:02:02.470 --> 01:02:04.680 but I don't trust her to do them on her own, 01:02:04.680 --> 01:02:07.140 so I need you to supervise. 01:02:07.140 --> 01:02:09.060 ‐ Okay. 01:02:13.400 --> 01:02:15.560 ‐ It's a long list. 01:02:18.690 --> 01:02:20.490 HARPER: [ sighs ] Okay. 01:02:20.490 --> 01:02:21.820 [ groans ] 01:02:32.000 --> 01:02:33.750 ABBY: No, no. 01:02:34.790 --> 01:02:36.080 [ phone vibrating ] 01:02:38.210 --> 01:02:41.090 Hey. JOHN: Okay, so... 01:02:41.090 --> 01:02:44.470 I might have been a little judgmental when we last spoke. 01:02:44.470 --> 01:02:48.140 You are in an unusual situation, and as your friend, 01:02:48.140 --> 01:02:50.470 I should have created a safe space for you to share 01:02:50.470 --> 01:02:52.890 without the threat of criticism, so... 01:02:52.890 --> 01:02:54.560 I'm sorry. 01:02:54.560 --> 01:02:56.230 I am here. 01:02:56.230 --> 01:02:57.860 No judgment. 01:02:57.860 --> 01:02:59.400 What is going on? 01:02:59.400 --> 01:03:00.980 ABBY: Well, let's see. 01:03:00.980 --> 01:03:03.110 I was arrested by mall security yesterday, 01:03:03.110 --> 01:03:05.280 and now Harper's entire family thinks I'm a criminal. 01:03:05.280 --> 01:03:07.740 And after spending her entire night, like, 01:03:07.740 --> 01:03:11.660 until 2:00 in the morning, with her ex‐boyfriend Connor, 01:03:11.660 --> 01:03:14.000 she's acting like someone I barely even recognize. 01:03:14.000 --> 01:03:16.580 And I want to just get out of here, but it would cost me 01:03:16.580 --> 01:03:18.750 like a thousand dollars to get a ride, and‐‐ 01:03:18.750 --> 01:03:21.340 This is why I avoid Christmas. 01:03:21.340 --> 01:03:23.010 It brings out the worst in everything. 01:03:23.010 --> 01:03:26.050 I‐I know this isn't about me. I just feel crazy, like‐‐ 01:03:26.050 --> 01:03:28.720 Do I‐‐ It's‐‐ Do I stick it out for two days? 01:03:28.720 --> 01:03:30.720 It's‐it's not that long. 01:03:30.720 --> 01:03:32.810 But I don't know. I‐‐ 01:03:34.020 --> 01:03:35.890 What would you do? 01:03:35.890 --> 01:03:37.060 JOHN: Uh... 01:03:37.060 --> 01:03:38.520 Uh... uh... 01:03:38.520 --> 01:03:39.650 I... 01:03:39.650 --> 01:03:41.780 [ quietly ] Thank you. 01:03:41.780 --> 01:03:44.740 I'm gonna‐‐ I'm gonna need to give this a think. 01:03:44.740 --> 01:03:46.490 I think. 01:03:47.740 --> 01:03:49.570 ‐ Hello? 01:03:59.330 --> 01:04:01.920 [ inhales deeply ] 01:04:01.920 --> 01:04:03.960 [ exhales ] 01:04:07.050 --> 01:04:09.050 [ exhales sharply ] 01:04:11.180 --> 01:04:13.100 [ sighs ] 01:04:14.520 --> 01:04:16.140 Hey, um... 01:04:16.140 --> 01:04:17.890 Hey, it's Abby. 01:04:17.890 --> 01:04:20.020 Are you‐‐ Are you doing anything right now? 01:04:20.020 --> 01:04:22.270 Who's really gonna want a mini doughnut factory? 01:04:22.270 --> 01:04:23.820 RILEY: Uh, this family. 01:04:23.820 --> 01:04:25.860 I saw two of their cousins get in a fistfight 01:04:25.860 --> 01:04:27.700 over a quesadilla maker at this party once. 01:04:27.700 --> 01:04:29.780 [ cell phone chimes ] ‐ Oh, yikes. 01:04:36.910 --> 01:04:38.370 ‐ Everything all right? 01:04:38.370 --> 01:04:39.670 ‐ Yeah. 01:04:42.670 --> 01:04:45.840 JANE: Thank you so much. It looks so good. 01:04:45.840 --> 01:04:47.920 I mean, it‐it looks good. 01:04:47.920 --> 01:04:50.680 [ "The First Noel" plays softly over speakers ] 01:04:52.890 --> 01:04:54.350 JANE: This is all for me. 01:04:54.350 --> 01:04:55.850 [ chuckles ] It's not. It's not. 01:04:55.850 --> 01:04:57.020 I'm just kidding. 01:04:57.020 --> 01:04:58.730 It's for my‐‐ 01:04:58.730 --> 01:05:00.810 And yes, we'll have‐‐ 01:05:06.070 --> 01:05:08.190 Ready to go? 01:05:08.190 --> 01:05:10.820 ‐ [ gasps ] [ bottles clatter ] 01:05:10.820 --> 01:05:12.450 [ Harper sighs ] 01:05:12.450 --> 01:05:14.450 ‐ It's probably okay. 01:05:16.370 --> 01:05:18.250 [ grunts ] 01:05:18.250 --> 01:05:20.330 ‐ [ Harper gasps ] 01:05:22.080 --> 01:05:23.290 [ Harper sighs ] 01:05:23.290 --> 01:05:25.300 ♪ playful music ♪ 01:05:29.420 --> 01:05:31.890 ‐ Oh, do not put that there. 01:05:31.890 --> 01:05:34.640 What do you think this is, a barn party? 01:05:34.640 --> 01:05:37.560 Hey, everyone, please come down! 01:05:37.560 --> 01:05:41.230 We are getting this photo as soon as Jane gets here. 01:05:41.230 --> 01:05:42.940 ‐ Honey, are you sure this is the best time? 01:05:42.940 --> 01:05:44.400 People will start arriving any minute. 01:05:44.400 --> 01:05:45.980 ‐ It's the only time. 01:05:45.980 --> 01:05:47.320 [ door opens ] 01:05:48.940 --> 01:05:50.490 Hi, Abby. ‐ Hi. 01:05:50.490 --> 01:05:52.990 Oh, where should I put this white elephant gift? 01:05:52.990 --> 01:05:54.820 ‐ I don't know. In the oven? 01:05:54.820 --> 01:05:56.450 Jesus, Abby, where do you think it goes? 01:05:56.450 --> 01:05:57.990 Under the damn tree. 01:05:57.990 --> 01:05:59.620 [ sighs ] I'm sorry. 01:05:59.620 --> 01:06:01.290 I'm sorry. 01:06:01.290 --> 01:06:03.630 You probably never even had a Christmas tree. 01:06:03.630 --> 01:06:06.090 [ sighs ] We do this party every year, 01:06:06.090 --> 01:06:09.260 and every year, no matter how early I start planning, 01:06:09.260 --> 01:06:11.970 I just feel totally unprepared. 01:06:11.970 --> 01:06:15.760 [ sighs ] And I can't find my Christmas brooch. 01:06:15.760 --> 01:06:17.310 Have you seen it? 01:06:17.310 --> 01:06:18.890 You can tell me. 01:06:18.890 --> 01:06:20.310 I won't be mad. 01:06:20.310 --> 01:06:22.190 I just want to know it's safe. 01:06:23.650 --> 01:06:25.110 ‐ I haven't seen it. 01:06:26.610 --> 01:06:28.020 ‐ Okay. 01:06:28.020 --> 01:06:32.490 Well, if it should magically appear on my dresser, 01:06:32.490 --> 01:06:34.490 there will be no questions asked. 01:06:34.490 --> 01:06:35.740 ‐ Okay. TIPPER: Okay. 01:06:43.790 --> 01:06:46.290 ‐ [ sighs ] Um... 01:06:46.290 --> 01:06:47.500 Hey, Ted. 01:06:48.590 --> 01:06:51.720 I just wanted to mention‐‐ 01:06:51.720 --> 01:06:54.970 everything that happened yesterday was a complete misunderstanding. 01:06:54.970 --> 01:06:56.470 You know, I would never, ever‐‐ 01:06:56.470 --> 01:06:58.720 You‐you don't‐‐ You don't have to explain. 01:06:58.720 --> 01:07:01.140 Let's just avoid any further incidents, yes? 01:07:01.140 --> 01:07:02.890 ‐ Yeah. Yes. TED: Okay. 01:07:02.890 --> 01:07:05.440 ‐ Ho, ho, ho. Merry Christmas Eve. TED: Oh. 01:07:05.440 --> 01:07:07.440 ‐ [ chuckles ] Hey, Abby. ABBY: Hey. 01:07:07.440 --> 01:07:09.440 ‐ Look at what this little elf brought in. 01:07:09.440 --> 01:07:11.280 [ squeals ] ABBY: Wow. What is that? 01:07:11.280 --> 01:07:13.030 ‐ This is my masterpiece. 01:07:13.030 --> 01:07:15.530 Whoever picks it is gonna be very pleased. 01:07:15.530 --> 01:07:16.950 ‐ Oh, Jane, I'm so glad you're here. 01:07:16.950 --> 01:07:18.280 The printer's jammed again. 01:07:18.280 --> 01:07:20.290 ‐ Oh, okay. I'm on it. 01:07:32.300 --> 01:07:34.920 ‐ Hey. ‐ Hey. 01:07:34.920 --> 01:07:36.720 What'd you do today? 01:07:36.720 --> 01:07:40.050 ‐ I just went and got a white elephant gift. 01:07:40.050 --> 01:07:41.390 ‐ Oh. 01:07:41.390 --> 01:07:42.850 In town? 01:07:42.850 --> 01:07:44.180 ‐ Yeah. 01:07:44.180 --> 01:07:45.600 ‐ How'd you get there? 01:07:45.600 --> 01:07:46.690 ‐ Has Jane arrived yet? 01:07:46.690 --> 01:07:49.520 ‐ Yeah, Jane's in Ted's office with him. 01:07:49.520 --> 01:07:51.400 TIPPER: Jane, Ted, now! 01:07:51.400 --> 01:07:54.030 Nice of you two to join us. Where are the twins? 01:07:54.030 --> 01:07:56.740 ‐ They don't feel like having their picture taken tonight. 01:07:56.740 --> 01:07:59.280 ‐ [ Tipper sighs ] 01:07:59.280 --> 01:08:01.790 TIPPER: Harper, come with me. 01:08:02.830 --> 01:08:05.290 ♪ upbeat holiday music ♪ 01:08:07.920 --> 01:08:09.420 SLOANE: It's really a break from 01:08:09.420 --> 01:08:12.550 traditional gifting and a move into the extraordinary. 01:08:12.550 --> 01:08:15.220 The vessels are curated for each individual. 01:08:15.220 --> 01:08:17.840 We'd be happy to mindfully assemble‐‐ TED: Uh, S‐Sloane was 01:08:17.840 --> 01:08:21.550 on track to make partner at her firm before she left to start a family. 01:08:21.550 --> 01:08:22.720 She's our super mom, 01:08:22.720 --> 01:08:27.140 Harper is our powerhouse, and, uh, Jane... 01:08:27.140 --> 01:08:29.850 i‐is the only reason the Internet ever works in this house. 01:08:29.850 --> 01:08:31.310 ‐ [ laughing ] JANE: Aw. 01:08:31.310 --> 01:08:33.150 I have a way with routers. 01:08:35.030 --> 01:08:36.780 ERIC: Excuse me, all. 01:08:36.780 --> 01:08:38.950 Uh, the twins have prepared a little song for you. 01:08:38.950 --> 01:08:40.240 HARPER: Oh. 01:08:40.240 --> 01:08:42.700 [ piano playing "Silent Night" ] 01:08:45.370 --> 01:08:48.620 ‐ ♪ Silent night ♪ 01:08:48.620 --> 01:08:51.460 ♪ Holy night ♪ 01:08:51.460 --> 01:08:53.500 ♪ All is calm... ♪ 01:08:53.500 --> 01:08:55.590 ‐ What are you drinking? 01:08:55.590 --> 01:08:57.800 ‐ Oh, it's a spiced... alcohol. 01:08:57.800 --> 01:09:00.220 ‐ Gross. Can I have some? ‐ Yeah. 01:09:00.220 --> 01:09:03.350 KIDS: ♪ Mother and child... ♪ 01:09:03.350 --> 01:09:05.850 ‐Mm‐hmm. ‐ So, Plort is the leader of the Shadow Dreamers. 01:09:05.850 --> 01:09:07.890 He's half human, half Quazzle. ‐ Mm‐hmm. Mm‐hmm. 01:09:07.890 --> 01:09:10.310 ‐ He's got the eyes of a Verg but the heart of a Zengle. 01:09:10.310 --> 01:09:12.230 The Verg comes from his mother's side, generations back. 01:09:12.230 --> 01:09:14.020 SLOANE: If you want the spa package vessel, 01:09:14.020 --> 01:09:15.860 you could do edible bubble bath. ‐ Excuse me, Sloane. 01:09:15.860 --> 01:09:17.990 Uh, Harry wants to meet the twins. 01:09:17.990 --> 01:09:19.360 ‐ I'll find them. TED: Okay. 01:09:19.360 --> 01:09:20.700 ‐ Excuse me. 01:09:20.700 --> 01:09:23.580 ‐ You know? Thing is, my parents were so attached 01:09:23.580 --> 01:09:28.040 to me believing in Santa Claus that even after years go by 01:09:28.040 --> 01:09:30.080 and I stop believing in Santa Claus, 01:09:30.080 --> 01:09:32.250 and they knew that I stopped believing in Santa Claus, 01:09:32.250 --> 01:09:34.250 we just kept that charade going. 01:09:34.250 --> 01:09:37.460 Their investment in it just made me feel so bad for them, you know? 01:09:37.460 --> 01:09:39.010 ‐ Mm‐hmm. 01:09:40.050 --> 01:09:42.390 Yeah. 01:09:42.390 --> 01:09:44.430 ‐ Like, so bad for them that... 01:09:44.430 --> 01:09:47.720 you know, that I eventually just murdered them. 01:09:47.720 --> 01:09:48.890 ‐ That sounds fun. ‐ Mm. 01:09:48.890 --> 01:09:50.350 Okay. 01:09:51.390 --> 01:09:53.020 What is happening? 01:09:53.020 --> 01:09:54.480 CONNOR: Hey, you guys. 01:09:54.480 --> 01:09:56.150 HARPER: Connor, you made it. 01:09:56.150 --> 01:09:57.860 JANE: Hi. Merry Christmas. Hi. CONNOR: Hey, guys. Merry Christmas. 01:09:57.860 --> 01:09:59.690 Good to see you. Hi. ‐ [ Abby sighs ] 01:09:59.690 --> 01:10:02.110 CONNOR: Merry Christmas. ‐ I don't know. 01:10:04.160 --> 01:10:05.950 Yesterday, I'd never felt closer 01:10:05.950 --> 01:10:08.330 to another person in my entire life, and now I... 01:10:08.330 --> 01:10:11.040 I don't know her. 01:10:11.040 --> 01:10:14.460 And I thought she loved me and was happy, but I... 01:10:14.460 --> 01:10:18.500 I‐I see her here, and she's so terrified of what everyone thinks, 01:10:18.500 --> 01:10:20.840 and it's just making me wonder who the real Harper is. 01:10:20.840 --> 01:10:22.880 You know? 01:10:22.880 --> 01:10:24.930 ‐ Well, maybe they both are. 01:10:28.220 --> 01:10:30.220 ‐ I was gonna ask her to marry me tomorrow. 01:10:37.110 --> 01:10:40.110 ‐ Um, I'm gonna get you a real drink. 01:10:40.110 --> 01:10:41.950 Okay? 01:10:45.370 --> 01:10:46.620 JOHN: [ whispers ] Abby. 01:10:46.620 --> 01:10:48.410 Abby! [ clears throat ] 01:10:48.410 --> 01:10:50.450 Sorry. What? 01:10:51.450 --> 01:10:52.620 ABBY: Um... 01:10:53.830 --> 01:10:55.080 How are you here? 01:10:55.080 --> 01:10:56.500 ‐ When are you gonna get this? 01:10:56.500 --> 01:10:58.250 I have been tracking you. 01:10:58.250 --> 01:10:59.630 Mm, mm, mm, mm. [ clears throat ] 01:10:59.630 --> 01:11:00.840 ‐ Hello. 01:11:00.840 --> 01:11:01.840 ‐ Hi. 01:11:01.840 --> 01:11:02.880 TIPPER: I'm Tipper. 01:11:02.880 --> 01:11:04.470 This is my home. JOHN: Oh. 01:11:04.470 --> 01:11:06.220 ‐ Are you the ex‐boyfriend? 01:11:10.890 --> 01:11:13.730 ‐ [ clears throat ] Y‐Yes. I am John, 01:11:13.730 --> 01:11:16.350 Abby's heterosexual ex‐boyfriend, 01:11:16.350 --> 01:11:19.440 and I have come to get her back. 01:11:19.440 --> 01:11:20.980 TIPPER: Mm. I see. 01:11:20.980 --> 01:11:24.820 Well, it would've been nice to have known you were coming, 01:11:24.820 --> 01:11:28.320 but since you are here, enjoy. 01:11:28.320 --> 01:11:30.330 JOHN: Thank you so much. 01:11:31.790 --> 01:11:34.120 Okay, I nailed that, and she is fabulous. 01:11:34.120 --> 01:11:35.370 ‐ What are you doing? 01:11:35.370 --> 01:11:38.170 ‐ That phone call earlier was a cry for help. 01:11:38.170 --> 01:11:40.630 I'm here to rescue you. Please get your things. 01:11:40.630 --> 01:11:42.630 ‐ [ sighs ] 01:11:45.300 --> 01:11:46.470 ‐ Is that the ex‐boyfriend? 01:11:46.470 --> 01:11:47.930 ‐ [ indistinct conversation ] 01:11:47.930 --> 01:11:49.390 ‐ [ gasps ] Oh, my God. 01:11:50.560 --> 01:11:52.560 ‐ I mean, I guess he's handsome. I‐‐ 01:11:52.560 --> 01:11:54.560 Can we please go? 01:11:59.650 --> 01:12:01.190 ‐ Harper. 01:12:01.190 --> 01:12:02.650 It's over. 01:12:02.650 --> 01:12:04.190 I'm done. 01:12:10.280 --> 01:12:12.290 ‐ I'm just gonna... 01:12:13.370 --> 01:12:16.040 ‐ Everybody, please take your seats. 01:12:16.040 --> 01:12:18.880 We're ready to begin white elephant. 01:12:20.630 --> 01:12:22.090 HARPER: Abby. Hey. 01:12:22.090 --> 01:12:23.420 Can we just talk for a second? 01:12:23.420 --> 01:12:25.210 ‐ No. I got to go. I‐I can't‐‐ 01:12:25.210 --> 01:12:26.800 I can't do this for you anymore. 01:12:26.800 --> 01:12:28.550 But, uh, merry Christmas. 01:12:28.550 --> 01:12:32.010 Enjoy your family, and enjoy Connor. 01:12:32.010 --> 01:12:35.140 ‐ What? What? No, I don't‐‐ I don't want him. 01:12:35.140 --> 01:12:36.730 I don't want Connor. 01:12:36.730 --> 01:12:37.890 I want you. 01:12:37.890 --> 01:12:39.060 ‐ Then what was that? 01:12:39.060 --> 01:12:40.770 ‐ I don't know. 01:12:40.770 --> 01:12:43.610 Why are you huddled in a corner with Riley? 01:12:43.610 --> 01:12:45.940 ‐ None of this has anything to do with Riley. 01:12:45.940 --> 01:12:48.360 This is all happening because of you, Harper. 01:12:48.360 --> 01:12:51.950 You not telling your parents about us is a choice that you made. 01:12:51.950 --> 01:12:53.910 ‐ It is not that simple. ABBY: Do you know how painful 01:12:53.910 --> 01:12:58.370 it's been to watch the person that I love choose to hide me? 01:12:58.370 --> 01:13:00.880 ‐ I am not hiding you. I am hiding me. 01:13:01.920 --> 01:13:03.750 Okay? 01:13:03.750 --> 01:13:06.840 Our entire life, we have been expected to be 01:13:06.840 --> 01:13:10.800 these perfect, golden children. 01:13:11.970 --> 01:13:15.520 I mean, love in our house wasn't something we just got for free. 01:13:15.520 --> 01:13:17.100 It is something that we competed for, 01:13:17.100 --> 01:13:19.520 and if we veered off their course, we lost it. 01:13:21.020 --> 01:13:23.270 I‐I know it's messed up, okay? 01:13:23.270 --> 01:13:24.940 I get it. 01:13:24.940 --> 01:13:26.610 But they're my parents, 01:13:26.610 --> 01:13:29.110 and I am scared that if I tell them who I really am, 01:13:29.110 --> 01:13:31.280 I will lose them. 01:13:31.280 --> 01:13:34.910 And I know, if I don't tell them, I will lose you. 01:13:36.950 --> 01:13:38.960 I don't want to lose you. 01:13:41.210 --> 01:13:42.540 ‐ Hey, come here. Come here. 01:13:42.540 --> 01:13:44.290 ‐ No, I don't want to lose you. ‐ No, no. 01:13:44.290 --> 01:13:46.250 Look at me. Come here. Look at me. It's okay. 01:13:46.250 --> 01:13:48.340 ‐ I don't‐‐ ‐ Hey, stop. 01:13:50.010 --> 01:13:52.390 HARPER: I don't want to lose you. ABBY: You're not. 01:13:57.390 --> 01:13:59.770 SLOANE: Matilda and Magnus... 01:14:03.310 --> 01:14:05.230 TIPPER: If you want a present... [ laughs ] 01:14:05.230 --> 01:14:07.230 you better have a number. 01:14:07.230 --> 01:14:08.610 ‐ [ clears throat ] 'Sup? 01:14:08.610 --> 01:14:09.990 ‐ 'Sup? 01:14:09.990 --> 01:14:11.530 TIPPER: Anybody else? 01:14:11.530 --> 01:14:12.820 ‐ [ chuckles ] 01:14:12.820 --> 01:14:14.820 ‐ You pump? 01:14:15.950 --> 01:14:18.490 ‐ I'm sorry? ‐ Weights. 01:14:18.490 --> 01:14:20.370 ‐ Oh. ‐ Yeah. 01:14:21.500 --> 01:14:23.460 ‐ Yeah. 01:14:23.460 --> 01:14:25.880 You? ‐ Yeah. Yeah. 01:14:27.000 --> 01:14:29.010 ‐ What do you bench? ‐ [ sighs ] 01:14:30.090 --> 01:14:32.090 Thousand. Thou‐Thousand, plus. 01:14:32.090 --> 01:14:34.140 TIPPER: All right. Everybody have your numbers? 01:14:34.140 --> 01:14:35.760 SLOANE: Kids? ‐ Sloane, Sloane, Sloane! 01:14:35.760 --> 01:14:37.350 ‐ Hmm? Yeah? ‐ Can we just talk for a sec? 01:14:37.350 --> 01:14:39.350 ‐ Oh, what's there to talk about? You and Abby are in 01:14:39.350 --> 01:14:41.180 a romantic relationship, and you've been lying 01:14:41.180 --> 01:14:42.940 to the family about it for God knows how long. 01:14:42.940 --> 01:14:44.520 Does that sound about right, or‐‐ 01:14:44.520 --> 01:14:48.230 ‐ Just, uh, please don't tell Mom and Dad yet. 01:14:48.230 --> 01:14:50.530 ‐ [ chuckles softly ] ‐ Please, Sloane. 01:14:50.530 --> 01:14:52.860 I'm telling them after the holidays. 01:14:59.490 --> 01:15:01.450 ‐ [ chuckles ] 01:15:01.450 --> 01:15:02.790 Just rip it. 01:15:02.790 --> 01:15:04.670 HARPER: Please promise me you won't say anything. 01:15:04.670 --> 01:15:07.080 Now is just very bad timing, 01:15:07.080 --> 01:15:09.170 and I'm telling them everything after the holidays anyways. 01:15:09.170 --> 01:15:10.710 ‐ Honestly, I feel sorry for you. 01:15:10.710 --> 01:15:12.340 Mom and Dad are gonna be so heartbroken 01:15:12.340 --> 01:15:14.340 when they find out you've been lying to them. [ clattering ] 01:15:14.340 --> 01:15:16.550 ‐ Sloane, if you‐‐ ‐ [ gasps ] Wait. Kids? 01:15:16.550 --> 01:15:18.890 Found you! ‐ [ gasping ] 01:15:18.890 --> 01:15:20.100 HARPER: Oh. 01:15:20.100 --> 01:15:21.310 ‐ Are you kidding me? 01:15:21.310 --> 01:15:23.640 No one's supposed to know yet. 01:15:23.640 --> 01:15:25.390 We had an agreement. 01:15:25.390 --> 01:15:26.900 ‐ I'm sorry. 01:15:26.900 --> 01:15:29.570 ‐ I guess I'm not the only one with a secret. 01:15:31.480 --> 01:15:33.110 ‐ [ Sloane screams ] 01:15:33.110 --> 01:15:34.530 ‐ Wow. ‐ Yeah. 01:15:34.530 --> 01:15:36.410 ‐ Yeah, that is‐‐ That's‐that's good mass. 01:15:36.410 --> 01:15:38.030 That is solid. ‐ Yeah. Thanks, man. 01:15:38.030 --> 01:15:40.280 JANE: Oh, my God. They all look so nice. 01:15:40.280 --> 01:15:42.120 ‐ Just choose, Jane. ‐ [ chuckles ] 01:15:42.120 --> 01:15:43.910 ‐ Eeny, meeny, mi‐‐ 01:15:43.910 --> 01:15:45.460 [ laughs ] I'm just kidding. 01:15:45.460 --> 01:15:46.460 ‐ [ grunting ] 01:15:46.460 --> 01:15:48.880 ‐ You have no idea what goes on in other people's families, 01:15:48.880 --> 01:15:50.960 so you need to just keep your mouth shut! 01:15:50.960 --> 01:15:53.420 HARPER: You keep your mouth shut, psycho! 01:15:53.420 --> 01:15:55.340 ‐ I should run. Yeah. ‐ Yeah. 01:15:57.390 --> 01:15:59.140 ‐ Levi. [ clears throat ] We should‐‐ 01:15:59.140 --> 01:16:01.220 JANE: Huh. I wonder what this one is. 01:16:02.640 --> 01:16:05.270 ‐ Abby, get the Santa. ‐ [ strained grunt ] 01:16:05.270 --> 01:16:07.100 ‐ I mean‐‐ ‐ You stay out of this, Sappho. 01:16:07.100 --> 01:16:08.150 ‐ I would‐‐ 01:16:08.150 --> 01:16:09.860 ‐ [ grunting ] 01:16:09.860 --> 01:16:12.150 ‐ I don't know what this is. 01:16:12.150 --> 01:16:14.440 It's big. ‐ [ laughter ] 01:16:14.440 --> 01:16:15.990 ‐ [ grunting, screaming ] ‐ Oh! 01:16:18.490 --> 01:16:20.240 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. ‐ [ gasping ] 01:16:20.240 --> 01:16:21.780 ‐ Oh, gosh. 01:16:21.780 --> 01:16:23.790 Here, help me out here. 01:16:25.290 --> 01:16:27.500 What‐what‐what‐‐ Wh‐What is this? 01:16:27.500 --> 01:16:29.830 ‐ It's a painting of Main Street. 01:16:29.830 --> 01:16:30.750 I made it. 01:16:30.750 --> 01:16:32.340 ‐ I love that. 01:16:32.340 --> 01:16:34.090 [ clearing throat ] 01:16:35.920 --> 01:16:37.720 SLOANE: No! No, no, no! 01:16:37.720 --> 01:16:40.140 [ screams ] I'll kill you! 01:16:40.140 --> 01:16:41.180 ‐ [ guests murmuring ] SLOANE: I'll kill you! 01:16:41.180 --> 01:16:42.680 TED: What are you doing? TIPPER: Girls! 01:16:42.680 --> 01:16:44.930 What is going on? 01:16:44.930 --> 01:16:46.390 ‐ Yeah, what is going on? 01:16:46.390 --> 01:16:48.440 Harper, do you want to tell them, or should I? 01:16:48.440 --> 01:16:49.940 ‐ Don't, Sloane! SLOANE: Why? 01:16:49.940 --> 01:16:51.110 It's not good timing? 01:16:51.110 --> 01:16:52.190 ‐ [ grunts ] ‐ [ guests gasp ] 01:16:52.190 --> 01:16:53.900 ‐ Girls, stop that this instant! 01:16:53.900 --> 01:16:55.480 ‐ Come on, guys. Just hug it out. 01:16:55.480 --> 01:16:56.650 BOTH: Shut up, Jane! 01:16:56.650 --> 01:16:58.360 ‐ Don't do this, Sloane. 01:16:58.360 --> 01:17:00.820 ‐ All this because you're scared to not be the favorite. 01:17:00.820 --> 01:17:01.870 Pathetic. 01:17:01.870 --> 01:17:03.030 ‐ Sloane, you're making a scene! 01:17:03.030 --> 01:17:04.080 SLOANE: I am? 01:17:04.080 --> 01:17:06.450 You think she's so innocent? 01:17:07.580 --> 01:17:10.620 All of this is happening because Harper is‐‐ 01:17:10.620 --> 01:17:12.750 ‐ [ guests gasp, scream ] 01:17:12.750 --> 01:17:13.840 ‐ [ panting ] 01:17:15.300 --> 01:17:17.420 ‐ Harper is a lesbian. 01:17:17.420 --> 01:17:19.430 Abby's her girlfriend. 01:17:31.770 --> 01:17:32.980 ‐ She is lying. 01:17:34.980 --> 01:17:36.280 I am not a lesbian. 01:17:36.280 --> 01:17:40.070 Sloane is the one that has this big‐‐ 01:18:07.600 --> 01:18:09.560 [ grunting in frustration ] TED: No! 01:18:09.560 --> 01:18:11.770 ‐ [ Harper screams ] ‐ [ guests gasping, shouting ] 01:18:11.770 --> 01:18:13.730 ‐ Harper! ‐ [ Sloane and Harper screaming ] 01:18:13.730 --> 01:18:15.860 ‐ Stop it! Goddamn it, stop it! HARRY: Oh, my. 01:18:15.860 --> 01:18:16.980 JANE: No! 01:18:16.980 --> 01:18:18.980 Enough! 01:18:18.980 --> 01:18:20.320 ‐ [ both panting ] 01:18:20.320 --> 01:18:25.120 ‐ I put 100 hours into that painting, and you... 01:18:25.120 --> 01:18:28.370 you just destroyed it like it was nothing. 01:18:30.540 --> 01:18:31.960 It was something. 01:18:33.330 --> 01:18:35.840 I am something. 01:18:37.090 --> 01:18:38.590 And guess what. 01:18:38.590 --> 01:18:39.960 I like myself. 01:18:39.960 --> 01:18:44.430 And maybe you all don't because I'm not fancy. 01:18:45.640 --> 01:18:48.850 But whether you like it or not, I'm a part of this family, 01:18:48.850 --> 01:18:51.390 and I will not be left out anymore! 01:18:51.390 --> 01:18:52.690 ‐ [ screaming ] ‐ No! 01:18:52.690 --> 01:18:55.350 ‐ [ guests gasping ] 01:18:56.560 --> 01:18:57.900 ‐ Stop it, girls! 01:18:57.900 --> 01:18:59.900 ‐ [ groaning ] TIPPER: Stop this right now. 01:18:59.900 --> 01:19:01.070 JANE: Guys, you keep ripping it more! 01:19:01.070 --> 01:19:03.530 TIPPER: Kids, what are you doing back there? 01:19:03.530 --> 01:19:06.200 MAGNUS: Playing hide‐and‐seek like Abby and Aunt Harper. 01:19:07.410 --> 01:19:09.660 ‐ [ sighs, sniffles ] 01:19:13.250 --> 01:19:15.250 [ footsteps approaching ] 01:19:19.300 --> 01:19:21.630 [ sighs, sniffles ] 01:19:22.760 --> 01:19:24.180 JOHN: Abby? 01:19:24.180 --> 01:19:25.680 ‐ [ Abby groans ] 01:19:29.720 --> 01:19:31.600 ‐ Want to go for a walk? 01:19:32.640 --> 01:19:33.890 Okay. 01:19:34.940 --> 01:19:36.730 Okay. 01:19:36.730 --> 01:19:38.810 Come on. 01:19:38.810 --> 01:19:40.730 ABBY: My parents loved Christmas. 01:19:41.820 --> 01:19:43.150 We would do all the stuff. 01:19:43.150 --> 01:19:45.450 We would decorate and... 01:19:45.450 --> 01:19:47.870 do the tree and watch, like, every Christmas movie. 01:19:52.450 --> 01:19:56.210 After they died, I‐I couldn't really bring myself to acknowledge Christmas. 01:19:56.210 --> 01:19:57.750 JOHN: Hmm. 01:19:59.630 --> 01:20:03.300 ‐ The holidays were just a huge reminder of... 01:20:03.300 --> 01:20:05.840 them not being here. 01:20:08.010 --> 01:20:10.300 So I really thought maybe this year with... 01:20:10.300 --> 01:20:14.890 with Harper and meeting her family, you know, 01:20:14.890 --> 01:20:16.770 that it would just feel different. 01:20:22.820 --> 01:20:24.490 [ sniffles ] 01:20:24.490 --> 01:20:27.570 I don't‐‐ I don't think that she... 01:20:27.570 --> 01:20:29.570 loves me as much as I thought she did. 01:20:29.570 --> 01:20:31.240 ‐ Hey. 01:20:32.330 --> 01:20:37.330 Harper not coming out to her parents has nothing to do with you. 01:20:37.330 --> 01:20:40.330 ‐ [ trembling ] How could it not? 01:20:42.290 --> 01:20:46.090 ‐ Remind me, what did your parents say when you told them you were gay? 01:20:47.300 --> 01:20:51.180 ‐ Um, that they loved and supported me. 01:20:52.350 --> 01:20:54.560 ‐ That's amazing. 01:20:57.980 --> 01:21:00.400 My dad... 01:21:00.400 --> 01:21:02.230 kicked me out of the house 01:21:02.230 --> 01:21:04.940 and didn't talk to me for 13 years after I told him. 01:21:06.860 --> 01:21:09.280 Everybody's story is different. 01:21:10.660 --> 01:21:12.950 There's your version 01:21:12.950 --> 01:21:17.000 and my version and everything in between. 01:21:19.620 --> 01:21:22.920 But the one thing that all of those stories have in common 01:21:22.920 --> 01:21:27.420 is that moment right before you say those words, 01:21:27.420 --> 01:21:30.510 when your heart is racing 01:21:30.510 --> 01:21:32.800 and you don't know what's coming next. 01:21:35.760 --> 01:21:37.770 That moment's really terrifying. 01:21:39.440 --> 01:21:41.600 And then once you say those words, 01:21:41.600 --> 01:21:44.020 you can't unsay them. 01:21:44.020 --> 01:21:48.400 A chapter has ended, and a new one's begun, 01:21:48.400 --> 01:21:52.570 and you have to be ready for that. 01:21:52.570 --> 01:21:54.780 You can't do it for anyone else. 01:21:56.700 --> 01:21:59.620 Just because Harper isn't ready, 01:21:59.620 --> 01:22:02.170 it doesn't mean she never will be, 01:22:02.170 --> 01:22:04.080 and it doesn't mean she doesn't love you. 01:22:04.080 --> 01:22:05.750 ‐ [ sniffles ] 01:22:08.340 --> 01:22:09.880 [ sniffles ] 01:22:09.880 --> 01:22:13.430 I‐I want to be with someone who is ready. 01:22:13.430 --> 01:22:15.350 ‐ Mm. 01:22:28.030 --> 01:22:30.570 You look great in this coat. 01:22:30.570 --> 01:22:32.490 GUEST: Merry Christmas. Thank you. SLOANE: Thank you. 01:22:32.490 --> 01:22:35.070 ‐ [ quiet chatter ] 01:22:36.120 --> 01:22:37.870 RILEY: Just wait for me in the car. 01:22:44.460 --> 01:22:45.670 Great party. 01:22:46.710 --> 01:22:48.300 ‐ Yeah. 01:22:48.300 --> 01:22:49.420 ‐ You okay? 01:22:53.050 --> 01:22:54.890 ‐ I'm so sorry. 01:22:57.100 --> 01:22:58.970 ‐ [ sighs ] 01:23:02.100 --> 01:23:04.270 Merry Christmas. 01:23:05.850 --> 01:23:07.610 ‐ Merry Christmas. 01:23:12.530 --> 01:23:14.360 ‐ She's a really good one. 01:23:14.360 --> 01:23:16.200 ‐ [ chuckles ] Yeah. 01:23:20.240 --> 01:23:21.450 ‐ Riley. ‐ Sloane. 01:23:27.630 --> 01:23:29.500 ‐ I'm sorry. 01:23:30.710 --> 01:23:32.880 Okay, come on. Let's get you two to bed. 01:23:34.970 --> 01:23:37.220 ‐ Thank you, Ms. Levin, for coming, 01:23:37.220 --> 01:23:41.470 and again, my apologies for the spectacle. 01:23:41.470 --> 01:23:43.230 ‐ I'll call you. 01:23:50.440 --> 01:23:52.440 ‐ What the hell happened tonight? 01:23:52.440 --> 01:23:54.950 Even as children, you never behaved this badly. 01:23:54.950 --> 01:23:57.870 I expected more from you, especially you, Harper. 01:23:57.870 --> 01:23:59.910 You know how this world works. 01:23:59.910 --> 01:24:04.330 Reputation is everything, and tonight you jeopardized mine. 01:24:04.330 --> 01:24:07.170 Jane, I know you‐you just wanted to be included. 01:24:07.170 --> 01:24:08.460 ‐ It was really nice. 01:24:08.460 --> 01:24:12.420 ‐ Sloane, making up lies about your sister. 01:24:12.420 --> 01:24:13.800 You're better than that. 01:24:13.800 --> 01:24:16.260 At least you used to be. 01:24:18.840 --> 01:24:20.970 ‐ Sorry, I'm‐I'm just getting my stuff. 01:24:20.970 --> 01:24:23.060 ‐ Wait, Abby. 01:24:23.060 --> 01:24:24.680 Wait. 01:24:25.890 --> 01:24:27.140 [ sighs ] 01:24:27.140 --> 01:24:29.150 Sloane wasn't lying. 01:24:30.730 --> 01:24:32.230 I'm gay. 01:24:36.820 --> 01:24:39.740 And I am in love with Abby. 01:24:41.950 --> 01:24:43.950 I'm sorry I didn't tell you guys sooner, 01:24:43.950 --> 01:24:47.500 but I know how much appearances and reputation matter to you, 01:24:47.500 --> 01:24:50.790 and me being gay just didn't... 01:24:50.790 --> 01:24:53.210 fit into the plan. 01:24:53.210 --> 01:24:57.130 But I... 01:24:57.130 --> 01:25:00.340 let myself hurt Riley... 01:25:02.140 --> 01:25:05.140 ...because I was so scared that you would find out 01:25:05.140 --> 01:25:07.390 I wasn't who you wanted me to be. 01:25:08.480 --> 01:25:10.270 And... 01:25:10.270 --> 01:25:12.860 I still regret it. 01:25:14.150 --> 01:25:17.860 I can't do that to Abby... [ chuckles ] 01:25:19.910 --> 01:25:21.700 [ crying ] ...and throw away... 01:25:23.080 --> 01:25:24.660 ...our life together. 01:25:27.620 --> 01:25:32.380 So I am done being scared, 01:25:32.380 --> 01:25:34.880 and I am done keeping secrets. 01:25:37.050 --> 01:25:38.800 I love you. 01:26:03.030 --> 01:26:05.450 ‐ Eric and I are getting a divorce. 01:26:06.700 --> 01:26:09.660 We separated a few months ago. 01:26:10.910 --> 01:26:12.960 And the truth is I didn't tell you 01:26:12.960 --> 01:26:15.210 because without my family I'm worthless to you. 01:26:16.880 --> 01:26:22.130 We've spent our entire lives trying to earn your love, 01:26:22.130 --> 01:26:24.140 and I'm done, too. 01:26:30.850 --> 01:26:34.350 ‐ I don't have any secrets, but I am an ally. 01:26:43.530 --> 01:26:44.950 [ distant door closes ] 01:26:49.040 --> 01:26:51.580 ‐ I'm gonna go. 01:26:51.580 --> 01:26:54.170 ‐ Wait. No, no. 01:26:54.170 --> 01:26:56.170 [ sighing ] 01:26:57.960 --> 01:26:59.880 I did it. 01:27:00.880 --> 01:27:02.590 ‐ Mm‐hmm. 01:27:04.300 --> 01:27:06.850 I'm sorry. 01:27:06.850 --> 01:27:09.470 Uh, it's just too late. 01:27:26.410 --> 01:27:28.410 ‐ [ sobs softly ] 01:27:48.680 --> 01:27:50.680 ‐ [ takes deep breath ] 01:27:52.600 --> 01:27:56.730 I have always wanted to try karate, 01:27:56.730 --> 01:27:58.730 even though I know it's not elegant. 01:27:58.730 --> 01:28:01.020 I hate flowers. 01:28:01.020 --> 01:28:02.690 ‐ I see what you're doing. 01:28:02.690 --> 01:28:07.360 ‐ We have been so worried about seeming perfect. 01:28:09.030 --> 01:28:13.000 But maybe we don't even know what perfect is. 01:28:14.040 --> 01:28:16.370 We have one daughter 01:28:16.370 --> 01:28:20.380 who has been unhappy in a marriage and felt like she couldn't tell us, 01:28:20.380 --> 01:28:23.670 and another daughter who... 01:28:23.670 --> 01:28:27.340 [ crying ] just had her heart broken 01:28:27.340 --> 01:28:30.260 because she was afraid 01:28:30.260 --> 01:28:33.020 we wouldn't love her if she told us the truth. 01:28:33.020 --> 01:28:35.020 And... [ sniffles ] 01:28:35.020 --> 01:28:38.650 the only reason that Jane is okay is because we gave up on her 01:28:38.650 --> 01:28:41.060 after she wouldn't stop biting in preschool. 01:28:41.060 --> 01:28:43.110 [ takes deep, gasping breath ] 01:28:43.110 --> 01:28:45.190 That is... 01:28:45.190 --> 01:28:49.410 very far from perfect, if you ask me. 01:28:57.080 --> 01:28:59.000 ‐ Thanks. 01:28:59.000 --> 01:29:01.170 ‐ I'm really sorry. 01:29:01.170 --> 01:29:02.670 ‐ I know. 01:29:02.670 --> 01:29:04.420 Me, too. 01:29:05.800 --> 01:29:08.180 And, Jane, I... 01:29:08.180 --> 01:29:11.640 I'm so sorry about your painting. 01:29:11.640 --> 01:29:13.430 It was really beautiful. 01:29:13.430 --> 01:29:15.680 ‐ It was. 01:29:15.680 --> 01:29:17.850 ‐ Thanks, guys. 01:29:23.690 --> 01:29:26.690 ‐ He just needs a little time. 01:29:31.320 --> 01:29:33.950 JOHN: Okay, listen to these ingredients: 01:29:33.950 --> 01:29:35.290 maltodextrin, 01:29:35.290 --> 01:29:38.000 autolyzed yeast extract, 01:29:38.000 --> 01:29:40.870 artificial colors‐‐ Red 40 Lake, 01:29:40.870 --> 01:29:44.130 Yellow 6 Lake, Yellow 6, Yellow 5. 01:29:44.130 --> 01:29:46.840 Because all of the yellows taste so different. 01:29:46.840 --> 01:29:49.590 You know, I am disgusted at the poison 01:29:49.590 --> 01:29:52.390 these corporations try to pass off as food. 01:29:54.220 --> 01:29:56.100 ‐ Who's watching the animals? 01:29:56.100 --> 01:29:58.310 ‐ My therapist is taking care of them, but we should have 01:29:58.310 --> 01:30:01.270 a conversation about the fish at some point. 01:30:02.560 --> 01:30:04.730 ‐ What happened to the fish? 01:30:06.860 --> 01:30:08.860 ‐ Let's look at gum. 01:30:12.950 --> 01:30:15.160 Okay, so I just want to preface this by saying that 01:30:15.160 --> 01:30:17.080 nobody would disagree that fish belong in the ocean. 01:30:17.080 --> 01:30:18.580 Correct? [ horn honking ] 01:30:21.210 --> 01:30:23.040 ‐ Abby. 01:30:23.040 --> 01:30:24.540 ‐ H‐How did you even‐‐ 01:30:24.540 --> 01:30:27.000 ‐ I tracked you. John taught me. 01:30:27.000 --> 01:30:28.460 ‐ I just want to go home. 01:30:28.460 --> 01:30:30.760 HARPER: I know. I just‐‐ 01:30:30.760 --> 01:30:33.140 Please, let me say this. 01:30:34.180 --> 01:30:36.430 You are my family. 01:30:36.430 --> 01:30:40.430 I mean, you are the love of my life. 01:30:40.430 --> 01:30:41.980 I was terrible. 01:30:41.980 --> 01:30:44.440 And‐and I wish that I could undo everything, 01:30:44.440 --> 01:30:46.820 but I promise you I will make it up to you. 01:30:46.820 --> 01:30:50.190 I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you. 01:30:50.190 --> 01:30:52.860 And I won't hurt you like this again. 01:30:54.990 --> 01:30:57.620 But please... 01:30:57.620 --> 01:30:59.450 give me another chance. 01:30:59.450 --> 01:31:01.910 I‐I want to build a life with you. 01:31:03.960 --> 01:31:05.790 Please. 01:31:07.790 --> 01:31:09.380 ‐ And what about your parents? I‐‐ 01:31:09.380 --> 01:31:11.420 ‐ No, no, I... 01:31:11.420 --> 01:31:14.130 I don't care what they think. 01:31:14.130 --> 01:31:16.510 I only care about you. 01:31:17.850 --> 01:31:20.470 If I have you, that's all I need. 01:31:22.770 --> 01:31:24.480 Be with me. 01:31:31.110 --> 01:31:33.610 ♪ uplifting music ♪ 01:31:35.410 --> 01:31:37.120 ‐ [ chuckles ] 01:31:52.550 --> 01:31:54.340 ♪ upbeat holiday music ♪ 01:31:54.340 --> 01:31:55.760 JANE: So, the Shadow Dreamers 01:31:55.760 --> 01:31:58.220 were compelled to rise up against Flanks. 01:31:58.220 --> 01:32:00.390 JOHN: Because of the blatant Thorfian rights violations. 01:32:00.390 --> 01:32:01.770 ‐ Exactly. 01:32:01.770 --> 01:32:02.850 ‐ Good morning. 01:32:02.850 --> 01:32:04.140 ‐ Hey, morning. Merry Christmas. ‐ Hi. 01:32:04.140 --> 01:32:06.100 ‐ Morning. HARPER: Hey, Mom. 01:32:06.100 --> 01:32:07.980 ‐ Hi. ‐ Hi. 01:32:07.980 --> 01:32:09.190 ABBY: How'd you sleep? 01:32:09.190 --> 01:32:11.150 ‐ Did he come down? 01:32:11.150 --> 01:32:12.900 ‐ No, not yet. 01:32:12.900 --> 01:32:14.320 SLOANE: Everyone. 01:32:14.320 --> 01:32:15.530 Go ahead, kids. 01:32:15.530 --> 01:32:18.320 ‐ We put the necklace in Abby's bag. 01:32:18.320 --> 01:32:19.950 MAGNUS: We're sorry. 01:32:19.950 --> 01:32:21.280 ‐ Thank you. 01:32:21.280 --> 01:32:23.370 ‐ Can we open our stockings now? 01:32:23.370 --> 01:32:25.210 ‐ Yes. ‐ Let's go. 01:32:25.210 --> 01:32:27.290 [ footsteps approaching ] 01:32:33.880 --> 01:32:38.220 ‐ Uh, I have sunk almost all of our savings 01:32:38.220 --> 01:32:40.220 into this campaign. 01:32:40.220 --> 01:32:44.020 Because I thought, if I won, 01:32:44.020 --> 01:32:46.020 you'd all be proud of me. 01:32:46.020 --> 01:32:48.100 ‐ We're already proud of you. 01:32:48.100 --> 01:32:50.360 ‐ We don't care if you win. 01:32:50.360 --> 01:32:51.520 ‐ Yeah. 01:32:51.520 --> 01:32:53.440 And the money doesn't matter. 01:32:53.440 --> 01:32:56.030 When I sell my book, I'll take care of all of us. 01:32:59.410 --> 01:33:02.200 ‐ I love you, girls. 01:33:02.200 --> 01:33:05.000 And I'm sorry for making you think 01:33:05.000 --> 01:33:08.080 that anything could ever get in the way of that. 01:33:09.080 --> 01:33:10.750 I want to do better, 01:33:10.750 --> 01:33:14.050 and it will take time, but all I want for you 01:33:14.050 --> 01:33:16.170 is to find the same joy and happiness 01:33:16.170 --> 01:33:20.800 that you have given me, no matter where it comes from. 01:33:20.800 --> 01:33:22.800 ‐ [ Tipper chuckling ] 01:33:24.890 --> 01:33:26.680 JANE: Aw. 01:33:26.680 --> 01:33:29.560 TED: Mm. ‐ [ women laughing ] 01:33:29.560 --> 01:33:32.650 [ "O Holy Night" instrumental playing ] 01:33:41.410 --> 01:33:42.820 ‐ Whoa! 01:33:42.820 --> 01:33:44.120 ‐ Smile. 01:33:44.120 --> 01:33:45.490 Smile. 01:33:45.490 --> 01:33:46.790 ‐ Aw. [ camera clicks ] 01:33:46.790 --> 01:33:48.830 ‐ You didn't think I knew how to do that, did you? 01:33:48.830 --> 01:33:49.830 ‐ I‐‐ It's impressive. 01:33:49.830 --> 01:33:51.750 ♪ ♪ 01:34:07.350 --> 01:34:09.140 ‐ Hello? HARRY: Merry Christmas, Ted. 01:34:09.140 --> 01:34:10.730 ‐ Merry‐‐ HARRY: I'll get right to it. 01:34:10.730 --> 01:34:13.270 I like you. I think you can win, too, 01:34:13.270 --> 01:34:15.230 and not just this election. 01:34:15.230 --> 01:34:17.610 ‐ Thank you, Ms. Levin. HARRY: Hold on. There's an "if." 01:34:17.610 --> 01:34:21.320 Now, I don't know if Sloane's revelation last night was true, 01:34:21.320 --> 01:34:23.530 but if it is... [ sighs ] 01:34:23.530 --> 01:34:27.200 and Harper can adopt a "don't ask, don't tell" policy 01:34:27.200 --> 01:34:29.870 regarding her private life, 01:34:29.870 --> 01:34:31.660 I think we could be in business. 01:34:31.660 --> 01:34:33.670 What do you say? 01:34:45.720 --> 01:34:47.310 ‐ Well? 01:34:47.310 --> 01:34:49.270 ‐ It's not gonna work out. 01:34:50.310 --> 01:34:51.560 ‐ Oh. 01:34:51.560 --> 01:34:53.230 ‐ We'll figure something out. 01:34:57.770 --> 01:34:59.570 TIPPER: Great, so‐‐ Wait, come over here. 01:34:59.570 --> 01:35:01.900 TED: Okay. Where am I? Here? TIPPER: You move there. 01:35:01.900 --> 01:35:04.070 TED: Yeah, okay. Okay. TIPPER: Hi, honey. Right. 01:35:04.070 --> 01:35:06.120 Um, Jane, you get in the middle. 01:35:06.120 --> 01:35:07.120 ‐ Yeah. 01:35:08.160 --> 01:35:09.580 ‐ [ chuckling ] ‐ Right there. 01:35:09.580 --> 01:35:11.330 TIPPER: John, would you mind? 01:35:11.330 --> 01:35:13.420 ‐ Oh, I would be delighted. 01:35:13.420 --> 01:35:15.540 Okay. 01:35:15.540 --> 01:35:17.880 ‐ Abby, what are you doing way over there? 01:35:17.880 --> 01:35:19.500 Get in here. ‐ Come on. 01:35:19.500 --> 01:35:21.670 ‐ [ laughter ] 01:35:23.930 --> 01:35:26.300 ‐ Okay. Everyone say, "Christmas." 01:35:26.300 --> 01:35:28.180 ‐ No, don't say that. ‐ [ Abby laughs ] 01:35:28.180 --> 01:35:30.770 [ "Make You Mine This Season" by Tegan and Sara playing ] 01:35:30.770 --> 01:35:31.850 [ camera clicks ] 01:35:31.850 --> 01:35:35.270 ♪ Somebody broke your heart ♪ 01:35:35.270 --> 01:35:38.020 ♪ Under a Christmas tree... ♪ 01:35:38.020 --> 01:35:40.070 JANE: "Once they cross Corvall Chasm, 01:35:40.070 --> 01:35:42.240 "they will enter floam territory. 01:35:42.240 --> 01:35:45.660 "The Shadow Dreamers know they might not all make it out 01:35:45.660 --> 01:35:47.450 "with their Krindoll intact, 01:35:47.450 --> 01:35:51.490 "but the entire Thorfian race rests on their shoulders. 01:35:51.490 --> 01:35:56.000 "They look to each other and then into the darkness. 01:35:56.000 --> 01:35:59.460 It is Glank who takes the first step." 01:35:59.460 --> 01:36:01.840 ‐ [ cheering ] 01:36:07.550 --> 01:36:09.350 ‐ Here you go. Thank you so much for coming. 01:36:09.350 --> 01:36:10.390 MAN: Thank you. 01:36:10.390 --> 01:36:11.970 JANE: Bye. ‐ Hi. 01:36:11.970 --> 01:36:13.140 JANE: Hi. ‐ We'll meet you there? 01:36:13.140 --> 01:36:14.140 ‐ Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 01:36:14.140 --> 01:36:15.140 ‐ Okay. ‐ Yeah, you bet. 01:36:15.140 --> 01:36:16.350 ‐ That was awesome. ‐ Bye. 01:36:16.350 --> 01:36:17.400 ‐ Hi. ‐ Hi. 01:36:17.400 --> 01:36:18.560 ‐ Oh. Two at a time. ‐ Oh. 01:36:18.560 --> 01:36:19.770 ‐ Aah! ‐ Oh, my word. ‐ It's an onslaught. 01:36:19.770 --> 01:36:21.070 ♪ ♪ 01:36:21.070 --> 01:36:24.280 ♪ Make you mine, make you mine this season ♪ 01:36:24.280 --> 01:36:27.780 ♪ Bells ring out on the street ♪ 01:36:27.780 --> 01:36:29.910 ♪ Snow falling at our feet ♪ 01:36:29.910 --> 01:36:31.780 ‐ [ indistinct chatter ] 01:36:31.780 --> 01:36:34.250 ♪ Lights glowing in the trees ♪ 01:36:35.540 --> 01:36:37.670 ♪ Will you dance with me? ♪ 01:36:37.670 --> 01:36:41.670 ♪ Have I been good enough ♪ ‐ [ Sloane laughs ] 01:36:41.670 --> 01:36:45.760 ♪ To ask for your love? ♪ 01:36:48.680 --> 01:36:52.310 ♪ You're the only girl I've got on my list ♪ 01:36:52.310 --> 01:36:55.680 ♪ I write your name, I know it's foolish ♪ 01:36:55.680 --> 01:36:59.900 ♪ But I chase the feeling 'cause you keep me dreaming ♪ 01:36:59.900 --> 01:37:03.940 ♪ That I could make you mine, make you mine this season ♪ 01:37:03.940 --> 01:37:06.820 ♪ I put a star on the top of my tree ♪ 01:37:06.820 --> 01:37:10.660 ♪ I just want to make you mine ♪ 01:37:10.660 --> 01:37:14.080 ♪ Its light is gonna lead you straight to me ♪ 01:37:14.080 --> 01:37:17.710 ♪ I just want to make you mine. ♪ 01:37:22.380 --> 01:37:24.380 [ song fades ] [ "Think of Christmas" by Anne‐Marie begins ] 01:37:24.380 --> 01:37:28.550 ♪ When I think of Christmas ♪ 01:37:28.550 --> 01:37:30.760 ♪ I think of you ♪ 01:37:41.440 --> 01:37:44.190 ♪ Remember the snow angels ♪ 01:37:44.190 --> 01:37:46.570 ♪ Unorthodox anecdotes ♪ 01:37:46.570 --> 01:37:49.400 ♪ About how it's never home ♪ 01:37:49.400 --> 01:37:52.120 ♪ Hmm, unless you're here ♪ 01:37:52.120 --> 01:37:54.780 ♪ Don't matter how deep the snow ♪ 01:37:54.780 --> 01:37:57.500 ♪ Don't matter how cold it goes ♪ 01:37:57.500 --> 01:38:00.000 ♪ I've already made it home ♪ 01:38:00.000 --> 01:38:02.330 ♪ Hmm, because you're here ♪ 01:38:02.330 --> 01:38:05.130 ♪ Still at the kids' table even though we're grown ♪ 01:38:05.130 --> 01:38:07.800 ♪ Hands on my kneecap underneath the table ♪ 01:38:07.800 --> 01:38:10.630 ♪ We got a secret only you and me know ♪ 01:38:10.630 --> 01:38:12.930 ♪ But they know 'cause ♪ 01:38:12.930 --> 01:38:16.100 ♪ A love like ours comes with the brightest of halos ♪ 01:38:16.100 --> 01:38:17.520 ♪ Yeah, they know ♪ 01:38:17.520 --> 01:38:22.020 ♪ That when I think of Christmas ♪ 01:38:22.020 --> 01:38:25.650 ♪ I think of you and me and a classic kiss ♪ 01:38:25.650 --> 01:38:28.570 ♪ Modern love is what it is ♪ 01:38:28.570 --> 01:38:32.570 ♪ When I think of Christmas ♪ 01:38:32.570 --> 01:38:35.950 ♪ I think of nothing more, nothing to do ♪ 01:38:35.950 --> 01:38:38.910 ♪ Unwrap myself in front of you ♪ 01:38:38.910 --> 01:38:43.210 ♪ When I think of Christmas ♪ 01:38:43.210 --> 01:38:45.500 ♪ I think of you ♪ 01:38:48.590 --> 01:38:50.970 ♪ I think of you ♪ 01:38:56.140 --> 01:38:58.810 ♪ Rewriting my memories ♪ 01:38:58.810 --> 01:39:01.230 ♪ Creating new history ♪ 01:39:01.230 --> 01:39:04.060 ♪ And the season feels new to me ♪ 01:39:04.060 --> 01:39:06.360 ♪ Huh, because you're here ♪ 01:39:06.360 --> 01:39:09.110 ♪ Still at the kids' table even though we're grown ♪ 01:39:09.110 --> 01:39:11.820 ♪ Hands on my kneecap underneath the table ♪ 01:39:11.820 --> 01:39:14.910 ♪ We got a secret only you and me know ♪ 01:39:14.910 --> 01:39:16.950 ♪ But they know 'cause ♪ 01:39:16.950 --> 01:39:20.120 ♪ A love like ours comes with the brightest of halos ♪ 01:39:20.120 --> 01:39:21.450 ♪ Yeah, they know ♪ 01:39:21.450 --> 01:39:26.000 ♪ That when I think of Christmas ♪ 01:39:26.000 --> 01:39:29.670 ♪ I think of you and me and a classic kiss ♪ 01:39:29.670 --> 01:39:32.550 ♪ Modern love is what it is ♪ 01:39:32.550 --> 01:39:36.470 ♪ When I think of Christmas ♪ 01:39:36.470 --> 01:39:40.100 ♪ I think of nothing more, nothing to do ♪ 01:39:40.100 --> 01:39:42.980 ♪ Unwrap myself in front of you ♪ 01:39:42.980 --> 01:39:47.310 ♪ When I think of Christmas ♪ 01:39:47.310 --> 01:39:49.690 ♪ I think of you ♪ 01:39:52.780 --> 01:39:55.240 ♪ I think of you ♪ 01:39:58.200 --> 01:40:00.660 ♪ I think of you ♪ 01:40:04.580 --> 01:40:08.790 ♪ When I think of Christmas ♪ 01:40:08.790 --> 01:40:11.210 ♪ I think of you. ♪ [ song ends ] 01:40:11.210 --> 01:40:13.210 ♪ joyous holiday music ♪ 01:40:43.240 --> 01:40:45.250 ♪ ♪ 01:41:04.220 --> 01:41:06.230 [ "Jingle Bells" instrumental plays ] 01:41:36.260 --> 01:41:38.260 ♪ ♪ 01:41:41.090 --> 01:41:43.100 [ music ends ]